They fail to see the bigger picture. Most plants died during the meteoroid impact. Only the hardiest survived. The impact applied evolutionary pressure. They too are applying evolutionary pressure. So really, they need to keep going until a plant strong enough to survive their lack of care is found.

Kids are conceptually much simpler than houseplants though. You just do exactly the same thing you do to take care of yourself, but at different scales, plus some entertainment. They also let you know when they need something.

Meanwhile, plants: "I guess I'll just die"

I don't know why I wrote all this but here's some house plant advice for those struggling:

POTTING

Don't pot directly into a hard planter if you can avoid it. Use a plastic pot (with drainage) and put it in the planter. This makes it easier to move, repot, and water.

As for repotting, people often repot too soon. Your plant is more likely to die from the stress than from being too big for the pot. Many plants prefer to be rootbound (monstera, orchids), too. Don't make huge jumps in pot size when you do.

WATERING

The top of the soil being dry doesn't mean you need to water it. What matters is if the bottom of the soil is wet. Plants usually prefer the soil to become completely dry between watering. Roots need to "breathe" and keeping the soil wet will make them rot. This kills the plant.

You can get a moisture probe for like $20 but if it's in plastic, you can tell just by giving it a squeeze. You can also kind of tell by weight. Pick up your plant after you water it and compare it to when it's dry. You'll have intuition for it in no time.

LIGHTING

The typically-used lighting requirements are insanely misleading. "Indirect" doesn't mean you can put it in the corner. It means it can survive an arm's length away from the window.

Almost all plants (including every single "beginner" plant) will do better directly in front of a window that gets several hours of sun each day. The more light, the better.

LED Grow lights are cheap and don't get hot. I use mostly Barrina T5s but there's other brands and styles more aesthetically pleasing.

Thank you for coming to my plant talk. This is general information and you should verify it applies to the type of plant you have.

Actually I don't think flowering plants even existed then, it was all like fern kind of stuff, proto trees, and the like.

"humbliong"

I read here that mint was a really easy plant, cause it just keeps growing. One of the 2 fucking died in a couple weeks.

I’m a person my age and I both have a kid and can’t keep a plant alive.

Cactus? I have one that gets watered every once in a moon and lives in the bathroom where the climate switches from tropics to arctic to desert every few hours.

I have a stick. It wasn't always a stick, but it certainly didn't manage to get any worse.

Snake plant is what you want.

The species of plants alive at the time of the extinction event that killed the dinosaurs were the ancestors of today's house plants. However, most species of extant species of plants that we have bred to be "house plants" did not exist, in current form, at that time. So, I wouldn't take it personally.

Having said that, if you're regularly killing houseplants in 2 weeks or less, then you probably need to spend a bit of time learning about how to grow them and whether you can provide the appropriate care for them in your home.

Also, a lot of plants we call impossible to kill are really just plants that can tolerate and barely persist for impressively long periods of time in very poor situations. Even with those, if you want them to live let alone thrive, you still have to give them the right care and environment. And unless you're already an experienced and successful plant grower or just incredibly lucky, you should spend some time learning about how to grow them or you're probably going to fail.

You can't permanently grow a full sun plant in your windowless bathroom without additional work and equipment. You might be able to stick a snake plant in there and ignore it for 3 years, though.

Plants vs plant

Aquascapes! Its basically a fishtank without the fish. Many aquatic plants are really easy to grow. Even the needier plants can become easy with a CO2 producer and fertilizer tabs. It sounds complicated but once its set up you can literally forget it for months and worse case is it needs a trim and top off.

Snake plant.