Sort of, i take care of the routine home tasks while my wife takes care of the organization or talking tasks.

Though as I've understood, that's how relationships are supposed to function, two people coming together to deal with life and supporting each others weak sides.

Neither and both at the same time.

For me the future or past doesn't exist. So i have to overlay higher thinking to it, because obviously time exists and needs to be taken into consideration.

I basically try to create repeated patterns or routine that in theory should yeald best results in long term, even though long term isn't something realistic for me. Basically extreme version of delayed gratification, but never getting to the gratification part.

As messed up as it is, kids have been a rather helpful for that. They're living and walking reminder that i need to consider the future and thanks to that every decision has their best interest in mind.

Otherwise, I'd be dead because, because neither the past or the future exist and the following the random impulses of this exact moment would be lethal.

Marriage breaking apart, slightly irrational fear, because we are kinda managing significant libido differences(my fault), but the fear is still there.

It's not like I'm only going to mess up my or my partners life, we have 2 kids as well and they're going to be the ones suffering the most. So if i give up fighting/trying/putting in the effort or don't even do it enough, ill be failing a rather big evolutionarily determined goal for any living being. Basically failing my main duty and one of the biggest reasons I'm still alive and somewhat functional adult.

I just overlay reasoning upon this fear, probably just suppressing it.

Yeah fair, but as the other person said. Maybe I've just done enough ASD and ADHD tests that im subconsciously already giving the answers that lead to the diagnosis.

In addition psychologist was seeing just a glimpse, ~60 minutes, of my life every 2 weeks. Yeah sure over the course of half a hear, but that's clearly not enough to form a coherent picture of a person. I can't even remember what we talked about last time(possible SDAM), neither am i the only person they were seeing so it's possible they can mix up people as well.

And it's not like they actually saw "real" me, which doesn't even really exist. All they saw was just an amalgamation of coping methods and behavioral habts developed and fine tuned over the course of 2+ decades necessary for whatever phase of life I'm currently in.

And it's not like i know what's going on inside either (possible alexithymia) i'm just a biological machine responding to external sensory signals to the best of my ability and always limited knowledge.

So they could have subconsciously gaslight/press certain buttons for me to give an appearance of ASD.

So you see, it's not like it that certain with current methods.

A better method would be needed, a one i cant effect in any way.
Even bloodwork would probably be lacking as that can be effected to a degree by me. Maybe brain scan, but maybe it's possible to effect which neurons fire by thinking about certain things. So probably a DNA test is necessary to know for certain.

I am diagnosed by a professional, but maybe i was faking it or masking.

Until theres a certain 100% way to know with analysis that cannot be affected by me aka bloodwork or a brain scan. The diagnosis will always be up for a debate and just an educated guess.

300, Mad max fury road, Fight club or anything from Warhammer 40k.

Though not for the deeper and hidden meanings in those, theres enough of trying to figure that out in day to day life.

Most of those just look awesome on simple surface level.

Ofcourse, who else would hate me as much as i do. I've managed to deceive others that I'm a goodish and somewhat competent person. They won't do it. Have to do everything myself.

I can handle it if needed, but will always gravitate towards pretty much ht same meals every day and there are people who say i have eating disorder or disordered eating.

Though it's highly beneficial so i don't see any issues with it.

Love it, I'm not sure I've ever actually wanted to be or share my time with anyone. Ofcourse i can do it, but I'd prefer ti be alone.

Indifferent, week like any other.

Past, present and future. That's the best i can do, but i have memory issue as well.

Past is just everything that has happened in the past in one big pile. For some things I can figure out a rough timeframe when it happened, but thats usually playing detective not act remembering whennit exactly happened.

Present is it, +-few hours or a day.

Future, maybe a week into the future, but thats about it. Far future doesn't exist, it's just made up.

Isn't that supposed to be the thought process for basically every IRL interaction?