On a related note, not having to know literally everything a public person has done before feeling safe to express even the most basic support for their work.

I appreciate the accountability, I don't want to support bad people, but back in the day it was like "I enjoyed that album" and then you went back to living your life. Lack of information made separating the art from the artist the default and it made enjoying new stuff take so much less effort.

Yes, also. More strongly I feel not being able to contact or be contacted, on chronic but varying intervals, gave me a freedom i didn't grasp by then, free from worries or work dependancies. I feel I was more independent and more relying on myself.

The mobile communication tool has became something else.

I still say I prefer wild conjecture.

Also less self proclaimed experts.

I made a friend a few years ago that would whip their phone out during our conversations to answer my questions or theories about the topics we were discussing. Every single time.

IMO a conversation is just that, I enjoy discussing ideas and theories about subjects I’m not 100% familiar with and want to hear your thoughts and theories as well.

To slice through all of that with a ‘let me google that for you’ was very much not the interaction I found enjoyable at all.

Taking that further: you had to expend a decent amount of energy with no promise that someone was there or that you didn’t have to go elsewhere.

Playing video games without the need to sign in, use server, update for a goddamn hour when I only have 45 min to play, and games made for fun rather than cookie cutter eye candy.

Oh I definitely have to wait before I can play games.

I had to go and buy a bunch of CDs to install World of Warcraft because otherwise it would have taken about 6 years on my dial-up internet connection. Then my father would probably have called, broken the download, and I'd have had to have started all over again.

Big concerts with crazy amounts of people and you got a $20 ticket made out of paper that you could save to display in your photo album.

God yes, affordable concerts that were actually performed live rather than lip-synched. And Ticketmaster had not become the monopolistic scum of the earth they are now. You could actually get really good seats at a reasonable price if you were willing to get on the phone and dial like a monster or wait in line at the box office. Very rarely would anyone overpay. Even scalpers' prices were reasonable compared to average list prices today.

No cops in school, no school shootings. Parents were not our chauffeurs, either. They might grudgingly drop you off somewhere or pick you up but you could not expect them to do both without a lot of cajoling and pleading or bribing.

Summers from 6th grade on were just incredible. I'd wake up whenever, head out and not come home until dark. If I was going to be later than that, I'd have to call and let the parental units know or there would be hell to pay but other than that I was free to do whatever....but I wasn't getting any money from the parents to do anything. If I wanted funds for my activities, it was up to me to figure out what kind of work I could do to earn money.

Yours is the root cause of a lot of grievances posted here in response to this question, thank you for so aptly putting to words a thing that is so real yet hard for many to see.

Damn it.

I knew this thread was gonna make me feel things, and that those things were most likely to be ennui and worse, but did you have to cut right to the bone?

I wanna return to the 70s

Which is odd, since not only can you call for help, but crime is way down now

I assume if you remember that you're old enough to go outside now unsupervised too.

I remember when return of the Jedi was broadcast for the first time on public tv, the next day 100% of the kids were playing light sabers at school. It was the original dub so we had some names wrong (Yan solo and for some reason Z6PO) , and being kids in sure most of the plot had gone over our heads but man, those lightsaber battles 🤌

Legit the lack of a monoculture has been one of the worst results of connectivity and has had some terrible knock on effects.

The freedom to make mistakes honestly. For real that hurts my heart to think about.

Oh yeah. This is a good one

I just don't like the account nonsense.

If it's required at a physical business, guess I'm going home.

I started doing this again. I leave my phone at home and just go out with a bit of cash in my pocket. I bought an mp3 player so I can bring along some music.

"Stand By Me" is now X-rated for child neglect and smoking,

Estate sales are where it's at now

Good one here. Garage sales were just fun to look through and you could find cool stuff you wanted for the want (not the resale value) for a few bucks. They were happy to make a few bucks and you were happy with your new thing.

Now stuff seems to either be dumped (in the bins or outside donation places in a rubbish heap) or sold because it has become valuable over time (RIP finding cool pokemon cards for a bargain 😭)

Garage sales were also just a cool community thing, depending where you live of course. You could be going for a little walk and just wander into a garage sale and chat to people from your neighborhood or strangers. Marketplace is just "my cousin's dogs friend will pick it up" 🤑

i've got my boss trained to not bother calling after hours. He was grumpy at first, and probably still is, but i just cant make myself care enough to read that email.

why don't you miss that?

That's what do not disturb is for. I tell them I don't even get alerts after 5 pm and before 8 AM. My phone won't ding so don't call.

Only time it isn't is when we negotiate overtime before the emergency.

I feel this so hard.

For me, I changed my definition of useful. I won't change the world with something or contribute to a world changing thing, no. But I can change the world for a few people

A lot of parents today just hand their kid a tablet when they expect the kid to be bored and leave it at that. Instead of learning to entertain themselves, they learn to sit passively and consume content. It starts young, too - toddlers with tablets with unfettered access to Youtube Kids, sitting back watching Cocomelon or AI kids' slop (it's out there, boy is it out there.)

To those of us who grew up without access to screens at any given time sometimes take issues with it, but not everyone does. There are some kids I work with whose parents explicitly say they don't want their kid watching videos at school. I get it, you want your kid to interact with other people and explore their creativity instead of sitting around watching something - I love that.

Recently a new coworker, much younger than me, asked why some parents don't want their kids watching videos. I was surprised, but I guess I shouldn't be. That coworker probably grew up with screens from an early age. Perhaps she can't fathom the world without it. Either way, the idea that some parents want to limit their kids' screen time was a foreign concept to her, which concerns me somewhat.

It was so much easier to keep friendships. Holy fuck. The amount of people who get upset if you don't text back within a few hours is insane. And it just keeps going forever - like a never ending game of tag.

I'd rather be lonely. God damn.

Gotta reset expectations, lol.

Everyone knows I'll respond when I can. I have friends who's work means they'll be unresponsive for hours - we all know it.

I try to be very responsive to certain people.

I found out recently that my kids get offended when I read one of their texts and don't respond right away. People are so needy these days. Makes me want to turn off texting on my phone.

It does blow their minds that I routinely go days without picking up my phone and that I don't use social media apps.

It may surprise you how many people can adapt to your speed of doing things. There are very, very few people in my life who expect me to respond to them right away.

One is my boss, but even he understands that if he messages me in the middle of a class (because I'm a teacher), he's not getting a response until I have a free block. And outside school hours, all bets are off.

You can't please all of the people, all of the time. But you can help other people manage their expectations by letting them know what you find reasonable. You might get some friction at first, but they'll figure it out.

Well, it still gets dark at the same time.

I was with you until "warm sea"

In Scotland!