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[–] 29 points 7 months ago (6 children)

It’s all fun and games until a W40K librarian turns up

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  • [–] 23 points 7 months ago (5 children)
  • [–] 7 points 7 months ago (4 children)

    I only have more questions now than before seeing this image...

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  • [–] 12 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    I can pulp your flesh and snap your bones in less than a second and without so much as lifting a finger. What is the power of technology compared to that?
    VEL'CONA, CHIEF LIBRARIAN OF THE SALAMANDERS

    I hope that clears things up for you.

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 11 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    A Librarian is a Firstborn or Primaris Marine combat psyker of the Space Marines who survives an Adeptus Astartes Chapter's rigorous screening and training to bend the powers of the Warp to their will for the benefit of their fellow battle-brothers and in service to the Emperor of Mankind. Beyond their psychic duties, the Librarians of the Astartes are also expected to record the great deeds of their Chapter and maintain the Chapter's storehouse of ancient lore, the functions for which they are named.

    Hope that helps.

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  • [–] 29 points 7 months ago* (2 children)

    Jealous. My library fines aren't outstanding, they're just average.

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  • [–] 15 points 7 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 9 points 7 months ago

    I work at a law firm, and am surrounded by law librarians, and yes, you do not want to tangle with them for any reason.

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    They got guns n axes n magic n stuff

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  • [–] 7 points 7 months ago (1 child)

    Welcome to Nightvale (podcast) has a plot point like this. "The Librarians" are spoken of like they're some sort of horrible creature that hunt down anyone who comes in, and most people never come back out.

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  • [–] 33 points 7 months ago (8 children)

    Meanwhile, in libraries: "I'm being laid off? WHY? No budget for so many staff? But I'm only part time, I don't even get health insurance... PLEASE, I'll lose my house!"

    lol, good job, OP - really stuck it to the man!

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  • [–] 22 points 7 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (3 children)
  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago (1 child)

    I don't think you understand how libraries function. It's not Blockbuster

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago

    It's that libraries are already over-extended in terms of budget. Running up fines by depriving a library the only resources it has, books on shelves that people check out, only hurts the few people still using libraries.

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  • [–] 6 points 7 months ago* (1 child)

    What is this format? I can't tell who is responding to whom.

    The white region in the middle looks like it was put there as a screen shot by the person who wrote the bounty hunter part, but then it looks like it is also supposed to be responding to that part, but there are no details on the bottom part about which accounts are talking or when.

    I guess it's all just one person's joke presented as if it's a conversation. But why not put in minimal effort to make it look the tiniest bit real?

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  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago

    Well if the librarians have a secret cabal of assassins at their service, now would be as good a time as any to get them to work on you-know-who.

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  • [–] 4 points 7 months ago
    [–] 10 points 7 months ago

    Steven King has a short story called The Library Policemen. You should use this as a reference.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago

    Worked hard senior year to track down an obscure philosophical text for some report I can't even remember, wound up having to use the interlibrary loan system from the next county over just to get my hands on it. The last time it had been checked out was like 6 years ago.

    It was such a gem I wound up never returning it, reasoning that "no one else will appreciate it enough", and it's been mine ever since. Think I still owe 75 on it, but I was a broke college student at the time lol

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago (10 children)

    Most systems are fine free now. What are you on about? Librarians don't have time for your nonsense.

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  • [–] 3 points 7 months ago

    My local library system went fine-free around 2020, reintroduced some fines around 2023ish and now they're somewhere between fine-free and not? I'm honestly confused and also I so rarely incur fines that I've not been able to fully figure out the current fine structure

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  • [–] [S] 2 points 7 months ago (3 children)

    Are they really? How does that work if someone returns books way late or never? Is there a point that they get charged the full amount?

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  • [–] 8 points 7 months ago

    Fine free if you return the materials. Otherwise, you’re blocked from checking out materials if you hit a certain amount ($10+ usually, depends on the library). There is a likely chance that they’ll work with you to reduce it and Unless you owe hundreds of dollars, you’re probably getting your account deleted in ~5 years so that’s also a sort of forgiveness.

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago*

    My library has no late fees but we do charge for lost or damaged item fees. We really just want the materials back. Fines are a PITA to deal with for both staff and patrons, more hassle than they're worth. They also can scare patrons into not bringing items back because they're worried about either the fee or being yelled at (our patrons skew young and maybe aren't used to how libraries work: they often ask about the cost for "renting" books instead of "checking out" books, and we have to explain it's a free service.)

    edit: scary librarian voice. a lost item will go on your permanent record and you won't be able to graduate until you pay it off

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago

    I have cards in 3 library systems. They all work this way:

    Each system requires a yearly card renewal, you have to physically go into a branch to renew, although they do have accommodations for disabilities and stuff. If you have not returned a book or have way overdue books, you will be unable to renew your card unless you return the overdue ones. The only fees I have are if I were to lose a book and it needs to be replaced.

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  • [–] 1 point 7 months ago

    Ours still has fines, but they're really small (max of $4 per item) unless they bill you for replacement for not bringing something back (or bringing it back destroyed.)

    I think it kinda works for the most part, some people just don't care for others' stuff, but I think a fine structure that's acts as negative reinforcement toward expected behavior without being overly punitive, is good for keeping material in the library.

    Heck, they even renew automatically. They're definitely not out to make a revenue out of it or harshly punish people.

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