If you like getting bird shit on your newly washed car, you're gonna LOVE getting dog shit on it

Just hang it from a tree like everyone else does for some god forsaken reason

Walk your dog by the local playground and make balloon animals for the kiddies.

I'm only crappy when it rains

I feel like Jack Black made a movie about this... Va-Poo-Rize!

North Korean moment

The world's approach to climate and waste

I've done the math on this before in another posting...and you basically need like 30 balloons for an average dog poop for this to work...

"But won't the heliu-"

"FOREVER!"

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, ...

Does it work on human poop too?

Every dog park will look like that 1986 Cleveland event...

S-s-s-s-southbound pachyderm!

Chaotic evil in the dog waste disposal alignment chart

Okay hear me out

What if you had one of those hand warmer pouches but instead of whatever chemistry is inside of it at that time you can replace it with thermite?? Then you can just incinerate it on the spot.

Va poo rize!

Guys, they're on my stoop. They've been landing there for decades now.

Release them over the White House.

Many people just foat them down thw nearest creek or river, or drain that flows onto a creek or river. No helium needed ! Or hang them in a tree :)