Does it come with massive amounts of anxiety every time I look at it?
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Or any other DOOM ( Didn't Organize Only Move ) pile.
Um... How many pieces form a pile?
I have two right now, and they might as well be a pile, knowing my patterns. They will form a basis of a good big proper pile until I have a manic episode.
I know mine's more than I can count at a glance.
More like
... do you have a pile that you see every day but never touch
or more like
... do you have a pile
No debt but still have pile of unopened letters. It's a huge relief when I finally tackle them and realize it's mostly just junk mail. Only to find it was pile from last year and this year's pile was on the other side of the desk to be anxiously avoided until I have the willpower to do it again in a few months. Then I remember that's how I got badly in debt in the first place.
It gets easier. Then harder! Then I find sonething new to dive into and forget all about it again
No extraordinary debts (just the normal ones on auto-pay) but the other day I inadvertently unearthed a speeding ticket from a traffic camera in a foreign country I traveled to four years ago.
I have no idea if I paid it, but now every time I see it I get filled with the dread that I'm somehow an international fugitive, and yet I'd still rather die in a foreign prison cell than call the number on the ticket and ask if it's been paid.
The trick with those is, if you never acknowledge you received it in any way you don't have to pay and never get in trouble.
...Probably, I only have one data point.
If you haven't gotten any reminders, they don't really care, and it may have even reached statues of limitations. And unless it's a real corrupt country, they'll just have you pay it if they "catch" you. Just throw it away.
What a surprisingly profound post.
That's how I feel about everything I learn through tough experiences and then try to incorporate and keep incorporated in my life.
Are there psychopaths out there that open their mail and read it?!
Those people also probably answer their phones when someone calls without texting first. The monsters.
Easy peasy my friend. Divide and conquer. I open all the mail, sort out the garbage from the important stuff. I throw away all the chaff and bullshit, sort that into important stuff that needs attention, and important stuff that needs to be kept track of.
I then throw the important stuff that needs to be held onto but requires no action, into a box with the year (or at least a year within the last 3 years) written on the side. And then every 5 years or so I throw away the old boxes.
At that point, what's left is just a few pages per week that I then give to my spouse so they only have a couple of things to deal with.
They then take those couple of pages and put them on top of the ever looming pile of toxic things that we will never dare to touch again.
However, this pile is strategically placed so that it can't be missed, and acts as an anxiety point that drives us to do other tasks that would normally be avoided, but now seems like a nice diversion in the shadow of "the pile".
Or at least that's the way it used to work, but now we just avoid that room completely.
No, nothing important comes through the mail anymore. But I've gone weeks without doing timesheets at work and it risked my employment.
How about if you look at that pile of mail and say oh yeah I need to read all that shit and then say I'll do it tomorrow and then you see it again in a month and do they same shit
Oh dam... I just did mine this week, and it took hours because its about 4 months worth. I do think it's partially due to being depressed more since it's mostly bills and I just avoid them.
Isn't that what a mailbox is for? Holding several pounds of junk mail and maybe 2 bills? 😶
I have a mail pile, but its a system. Whoever checks the mailbox sorts the mail by person. My pile is a sort of filing system.
Once a week, I grab my side gig check, open and check the medical/ insurance mail for anything out of the norm (on the tail end of a workmans comp claim that generates a lot) the opened med and paycheck mail then go to the bottom of the stack, the junk mail gets tossed, and the stuff i dont need now, but might have to reffer to later (like bank statements) gets returned to the top unopened.
If I need to refer back to the med/ pays stubs, they're now separated out in chronological order. As are a year's worth of bank statements if anything seems off with my accounts.
Once a year, after I file my taxes, the bank statements get tossed, except the year end one, which goes into a filing drawer, on top of another pile, along with all that years' pay stubs, major medical notes (like paid off ones, etc) the filing drawer holds 2 piles, that work out pretty well to ~5 years of important docs) so, whenever the front pile fills up, the back pile goes into the fireplace for burning, (since its now all 5+years old) the front pile becomes the back pile, and a new pile begins, ensuring im keeping 5+ years of importance documents, in chronological order.
At some point maybe, nowadays it's all just garbage so I feel like this is fairly common.
The test should be a single, rambling, five-page question and your score is the page number on which you give up.
I've seen my wife open the mailbox, look at what's in it, say "Ugh I don't want to deal with that," and PUT IT BACK IN THE MAILBOX
Important stuff isn't a plain white envelope.
Important stuff isn't sent just once, you get reminder letters.
So, I can sort the post another day because it looks like it hasn't changed since yesterweek
I am undiagnosed guy who relates to almost all the posts no this sub. This ain't one.

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