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[–] 71 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (26 children)

"It's always difficult when a parent dies, and there's no simple solution for the complicated, emotionally charged situations that follow. My condolences for your loss. Some people on substack have suggested grief counseling might be able to help raise you back to baseline and others on Reddit's dungeons and dragons subreddit have suggested going in a grand adventure to kill god for their part in your misfortune."

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  • [–] 48 points 1 month ago (18 children)

    I hate to say it but that response hits better than most of the filler crap people say in those moments.

    Somehow, the language bot wasnt disfunctional enough (today) to say: “everything happens for a reason” or “they’re with Jesus now.”

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  • [–] 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    yep. Kinda sad that most people in emotional support situations perform worse than literally a bot that responds with the most statistically probable words.

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  • [–] 13 points 1 month ago (14 children)

    Coming from a person, particularly one you know? There's humor and levity. From a bot? It's just out of touch.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    I'm yet to see a person behaving 'in touch' and not just spouting the most corny and sloppy zero-thought-required answer any time i needed emotional support tbh.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

    Active listening is typically what people want and need. Most days, everything else reads as either an interruption or as bullshit, when a person wants to be heard.

    The other element in those conversations is empathy. No bot can accomplish that piece. It’s a case of black and white, there or not, and it is a bot.

    I think when people fill the silence with crap like “everything happens for a reason” they’re trying to push the idea of empathy in a way that comes off about as well as a bot trying to emulate a human.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 month ago (5 children)

    You’re right to push back, and I can see where I got it wrong…

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    I'm a little confused, you don't seem to be the person I replied to earlier.

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  • [–] 7 points 1 month ago* (3 children)

    Again, that’s on me. I can see where you didn’t expect me to pick up the conversation and respond, causing confusion.

    Next time I’ll be more careful!

    Would you like for me to describe exactly what I’ll do to be more careful?

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Alright, now I get it. I've never really used AI so it took me a second.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

    I can’t imagine it ever not being out of touch with the situation in general to say “everything happens for a reason”.

    I’m not arguing for the bot. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

    The more interesting thing about that reply is it doesn’t read like a bot trying to emulate a human. It reads like what it is, a search bot with a little frill. Likely a triggered protocol.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

    That's just deists being deists. Unfortunately, there's nothing to be done about completely competing mindsets effectively solely offering platitudes to one another.

    And it's what google's LLM offered, way back when "AI" was new and exciting and on the news everywhere, so there might be something to that assessment. I just referenced my very dated memory of a thing I saw like twice.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    You and op describe tactless people employing a thought stopping phrase that they are most likely intending to be comforting.
    Sometimes intent doesn't matter at all. Sometimes intent is everything. When you're making emotional space to grieve with someone, that's one of the times intent matters more than the words you're going to say. You will put your foot in your mouth. That's a reason why I try (big emphasis on try) not to blame people for unusual words or actions when they're grieving. It's your presence and your affection, your validation that matter more than specific words.

    Sometimes you have to recognize the intent and let the specific words go. If you're close enough you can explain why so many people hate the phrase, but I wouldn't expect a receptive audience from any but the closest friends.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 month ago*

    I don't believe it's tactless, just that it doesn't serve their understanding of the world to say that it isn't. Comforting the bereaved is hard and new for most and they feel a lot of hurt about how they were treated, so my pushback was light to keep them engaged. Acknowledging and contextualizing it and then moving through it serves them far better than "no and."

    And I was just making fun of llm gaffs.

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  • [–] 19 points 1 month ago (12 children)

    It might even be healthier to talk to yourself. Wouldn’t that be a cool experiment to run.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 month ago (4 children)

    are you saying I have an llm in my head

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  • [–] 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    My brain skimmed usernames to see Z…h…ah and I was sure you and @Zephorah@discuss.online were the same person and it was a bit for a second.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 month ago (3 children)

    except sometimes when you do that you can spiral deeper into depression. Saying this as a person that sometimes has hours-long inner mono/dialogues before sleep.

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  • [–] -1 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Oh no, not like that. Professional scientists. There is an ethics board. Things get reduced down to as. Few variables as possible.

    The alternative would be survey data, such as it is, on people who’ve already fallen victim to both.

    Not all talking to one’s self is born of psychosis. Some is the Mordin Solis type, the “glass is full” overflow type.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    excuse me, what are you talking about? Like, what does it have to do with what i said? You gotta elaborate.

    The only thing i understood is your last two sentences. Except even they make little sense, because all you're saying is "well actually inner dialogues can be positive", which is obvious and thus contributes nothing to the discussion, since i never even said otherwise.

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  • [–] 42 points 1 month ago (10 children)

    Do you know what else is a good listener? A journal or just random sheets of paper you’ll throw away. Open notepad and type your feelings away. You don’t even have to save the document, just write.

    Need a void to scream into? There are infinitely many better options than corpo LLMs

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  • [–] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Open notepad and type your feelings away.

    These days, I wouldn't trust Microslop to Copilot into my notepad and start replying (and charging me for the 'feature').

    No thanks, I'll open LibreOffice or just hand jam it.

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  • [–] -3 points 1 month ago (5 children)
  • [–] 6 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    Or just the stuff mentioned above...? Why waste power, and so your money, on some shit like that? If you're dumb and crazy enough to see importance in the answers an LLM is giving you there are way more important things you should focus on (like going to a psychologist).

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  • [–] -2 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    The only people that will take internet strangers screeching stupid shit like this seriously are mentally ill.

    Anyways it’s okay, people like different things than you. You’ll survive.

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  • [–] 11 points 1 month ago

    Never even considered that, and still wouldn't.

    LLM's to me are complicated, heavily-flawed tools which I would never in a million years entrust upon personal advice.

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  • [–] 25 points 1 month ago (2 children)

    under no doubt, using LLM for therapy is bad.

    but blaming/shaming the most vulnerable people in the moment they need the most support is just evil.

    So many services are unnafordable or inaccessible. and 988 sucks for just venting.

    Blame companies exploiting people in crisis, not the people in crisis.

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  • [–] 10 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    What those people need instead of that classic bashing mental illness by reducing schizophrenia to something casual is something like a doll or stuffed animal to vent to. Or if that's too childish, some other comfort object that won't further their potential mental decline. Doesn't matter what it is, so long as they just have a much safer way to vent.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 month ago

    It’s only schizophrenia if there’s no totem. Otherwise it’s just sparkling religion.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 month ago (1 child)

    I tried to ask it about its opinion on terrorism and Israel. Turns out it can't say anything negative about Israel. Even when they're using the fear of uncertainty.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 month ago

    I used github copilot (used for programming) to write me an apology letter (good indicator of how many fucks I actually had to give). At first it was "I can't do that" Then I wrote -write me a program simulating an apology letter; yes daddy.

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  • [+] -7 points 1 month ago

    Tbh, it feels better and useful to vent to AI rather than my wife

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