I'm not sure I'm understanding. It's margarine or spreadable butter in a tub. How is someone supposed to use it? If I need a could tablespoons of it, what should I do that isn't that?
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I also always skim off the top to keep it level. I feel you, friend.
Not sure why this would be infuriating. Someone just used the butter, whats wrong with that?
Clearly they wanted to be first and it was mildly infuriating
Oh, someone forgot to add breadcrumbs there
Just pop it in the microwave for 3 minutes and back in the fridge. It’ll be GoOd aS NeW the next morning!
Isn't being a member here pretty much a full diagnosis?
Nope. It's just mildly infuriating, not something I'd lose sleep over. If it started to mould because of bread crumbs in it, then I'd be more annoyed because of food wastage.
Honestly if this is "mildly infuriating" IDK how you make it through the day.
This really is infuriating
Because people not showing respect to food - and keep it in its perfect shape and structure, as it's supposed to be!
And obviously, I'm not diagnosed with anything, only my wife complains, that's it really hard to cook with me ;-)
I refuse to cook with my partner because she can't just acknowledge that everyone does things in their own way, which is not necessarily better or worse than her way.
Basically, she's super bossy.
My partner thinks the same of me 😞
I'm very focused on optimizing things and sometimes I just want to ask, why she is doing things her way, because I think, that I'm maybe missing something.
She always brings up the example, that I even tell her, she washes tomatoes wrong, because she used warm water.
But they are just easier to cut, when they are cold and the skin doesn't already separate
She takes the critique very personal and now it's mostly me cooking...
Which is fine, but I'm feeling bad, because I didn't want to say, that she does something wrong, I see such things as external and we can improve, not attached to the person as a being.
So, when she does something better, I don't feel bad, I try to adapt her style.
Other way round, it's always a personal critique it seems
But I'm also very picky with food and obviously not an easy person. So I'm happy, she still sticks with me and I'll happily cook for her
So, when she does something better, I don't feel bad, I try to adapt her style.
Other way round, it's always a personal critique it seems
When she does something better, do you say something to her that shows her you've learned something and are going to change how you do it? It might seem like you have a "I always know best, my way or the highway" attitude but if you show a bit of humility and can accept that you don't always have the best methods, it might show her that you don't want things always done "your way", you're just looking for the "best way".
I ask, why she does that this way, so I can learn, and yes, I then tell her, that this is cool and I'm happy to do it that way as well
But asking already is triggering a defense mechanism now... 😞
In general, we are perfectly fine though and very happy with each other
So this is not a real problem, just would like to do it better
Edit: and no, it's not about "my way"
As I said, for me this is just an external thing I'm doing and isn't connected to me - like it's not a personal fault, if I do it wrong
I often ask her for help, because I know she does many things better, where I can't
We have the saying, together we're one good monkey
It's just some things, and I'm not sure how to it better, when I want to tell her about my learning experience/mistakes I've already made, and want to show, that's easier or better that way
And even then, I don't say, that I'm doing it correct, I only say, I do it that way, because I think it's easier/better
And I usually ask, why she is doing something her way, because I want to verify my own approach - because I think, I'm doing something wrong or miss a thing, I haven't thought about
Edit 2: current example:
In our bedroom it's getting bright quite early and I said, maybe we should think about curtains, because the window blinds don't really work that good
She said, she is worried about mold on the walls with them, and I said, ah, yeah, you're right, I haven't thought about the winter months
So hopefully, you now have a better picture and don't think of my like an asshole anymore, that doesn't let any other idea being ok ;-)
Final edit:
I just saw now, that you aren't the guy I was talking with first
I was hoping for an exchange with another one, that is seemingly in the same shoes like my wife, so I can maybe have an idea how to do this better
That was the original idea, why I started talking
Maybe you have an input yourself, but at the moment, you misinterpreted my situation
So hopefully, you now have a better picture and don't think of my like an asshole anymore, that doesn't let any other idea being ok ;-)
I didn't have this picture of you to begin with, I only offered advice because it seemed your partner thought so, haha.
This could be a language / cultural thing, but if I was doing something I've done a hundred times and someone asked me, "why are you doing it that way?" I would also be frustrated and defensive. Even though it's a simple question with no implications, it can feel like the other person is saying you're doing something wrong.
Let's look at your tomato example. They're washing tomatoes without even really thinking about it, and are asked, "why are you doing it like that?" (again, not a directly confrontational question, but can be perceived as such) Now slightly defensive they have to justify a behavior they did not think about before starting. The response is probably going to be short and.. not happy.
I know you're asking the question to find the best, most efficient way. You know that, and your partner probably knows it too, but when it happens in the moment (especially if they've already got a disposition towards those questions) it can be hard to look past your preconceived assumptions of the question.
So instead of seeing them wash tomatoes with hot water and asking "why are you doing that", maybe you can ask, "is it better to wash them with hot water? I normally use cold because xyz".
Well yeah, we're together since more than 12 years now, so by now she knows me and we're actually cooking together - usually the one with the idea what to cook takes the lead and the other one assists
So it's not a major problem, but there is always room to improve :-)
I've already tried different ways to ask, but as said, she knows me and can read between the lines ;-)
It’s a TUB of butter… it’s one thing if it’s a free standing stick but you dig into a tub.
But you can't spread a blob of butter as easily as slices. Do they eat it with a spoon?
Have you ever had a tub of butter? You just slide the butter knife across the top and it creates a thin slice of butter. You don't scoop a blob of it. Just think about it for a second.
Is the infuriating part supposed to be that someone got to the butter before you? Or is it that you don't like how it was scooped? What is the "correct" way if this is "incorrect"? Genuinely curious.
No, I don't mind if someone got there before me. That actually never crossed my mind!
I always thought of it this way: because the top is always exposed to air, it starts to go rancid and harden before anything else below it does. The more you dig, the more butter is exposed to air. I do not go through a tub very fast on my own.
Also, skimming layers makes it easier to spread, especially on soft breads and buns.
Can I assume it's the weird little flipped up part that's the problem, not the fact of it having been scooped into? Because while it wouldn't bother me, it would mean that little section is more exposed to air and that can be a negative over time. Oxidation is rarely a good thing in that situation.
If it's just that it isn't level, I don't get the mild infuriation tbh.
I mean, it is mild infuriation
This is how I took this butter/margarine thing - it's just a mild irritation, and thought I'd share something I thought could be relatable to some people. I didn't realise I would ruffle so many feathers. Perhaps I have read the room wrong and I shouldn't have posted here?
Haha, great post. This wouldn't annoy me, but it annoys you. So this is the community for that
I posted a picture of my loaded dishwasher to show people how my adult daughter just didn't know how to do it. The responses were 50/50, half were annoyed at me for posting it, the other half annoyed at her because she's so lousy at it LOL
Thank you for your support! It was only mildly annoying for someone to dig their knife in like they were stabbing it and wedging out a piece.
Haha, that's great! There's definitely a way to stack dishes to make it efficient, I agree. I admit, I'm not great, so I won't make a post about me mildly infuriating myself and others, lol.
Yay! Finally a post that’s mildly infuriating, instead of actually infuriating! I don’t care what the others say, you win this sub for the day in my book, OP!
Have you considered pushing your comfort level with your next new tub of butter?
You could put a knife in the middle and twist
You could segment it into smaller blocks inside
You could dig a bit out if each corner.
Personally typing those idea made me feel sick so I understand your rationale.
What's wrong with that? Keeping margarine level when you use it is not something I've ever seen done before.
Side note - margarine is not butter! It's a dyed oil product made to mimic butter.
Butter doesn't come in tubs.
Butter does, in fact, also come in tubs.
Ignore all the armchair psychologists, this is definitely mildly infuriating, along with people who leave the microwave with a few seconds left so you can't see the time and you also need to cancel their remainder before you can use it.
I will, thanks! Or someone who leaves only one sheet of kitchen paper on the roll when they could have just changed the entire roll (new ones in the cupboard above) and left the single sheet on top of the new one.
You should! Or people who leave their empty wrappers in the tub with the uneaten chocolates/sweets.
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