- Hegseth: tries to cut a deal, but ends up in prison
- Miller: flees country to either Russia or Israel
- RFK Jr: cuts deal
- Vance: cuts deal (and fucks a couch to console himself)
- Don Jr: cuts deal
- Bovino: dies in shoot-out vs Feds
- Patel: tries to cut deal but fucks it up and ends up in prison
- Rubio: cuts deal
- Big Balls: cuts deal
- Natalie: commits suicide in bunker after Trump doesn't show up to join her
Some additional ones:
- Loomer: prison
- Oz: cuts deal
- Lutnik: cuts a really bad deal
- Bessent: cuts a bad deal (that's slightly better than Lutnik's deal)
- Bondi: cuts deal but dies of cancer in the process
- Blanche: tries to cut a deal but falls and flees country
- Gabbard: flees country to Russia
- Noem: cuts deal and murders a puppy out of frustration