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[+] 86 points 8 months ago (3 children)
  • [+] 74 points 8 months ago (2 children)
    [–] 43 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    In Florida, is an extremely serious crime to even touch a manatee.

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  • [–] 16 points 8 months ago

    I once saw a park ranger just screaming at a group of guys and threatening them with $5000 fines just for getting near one.

    I told a friend of mine who surfs, and he didn't realize they were so protected. He said there's an old girl who comes to visit them when they surf, and she rolls over on her back so they can scritch her belly. I told him it was a $5000 fine, and he was bummed. He liked scritching his manatee friend.

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  • [–] 34 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    Listen, I get it, Manatees have no business wearing a bikini.

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    You take that back! Leave them damn sexy manatees alone.

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  • [–] 29 points 8 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 53 points 8 months ago*

    Manatees are struggling with climate change along the florida coast line where waters in the summer have been measured to up to 100 degree F in the ocean. It has devastated manatee floral diet. And they are dying off from it.

    Do not torment the gentle wildlife that you are killing off.

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  • [–] 23 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Why was the manatee in a park and why was it wearing a bikini. Lastly, was it a licensed wrestling match or unsanctioned?

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  • [–] 23 points 8 months ago

    She just wanted her bikini back after the manatee stole it.

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  • [–] 39 points 8 months ago*

    The other perpetrator:

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  • [–] 16 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    Her hips don't lie! That's shakira! You guys arrested shakira while she was doing her wrestling routine!

    You might have noticed she's not blonde.

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  • [–] 12 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    Manatees can't wear bikinis, their nipples are in entirely the wrong place

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  • [–] 10 points 8 months ago

    One is left wandering what a manatee in a bikini was doing in a public park...

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  • [–] 10 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    I feel there's more to this story we're missing here. ..but damn, I'd wrestle her any day...

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  • [–] 9 points 8 months ago

    choke me mommy

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  • [–] 9 points 8 months ago

    LEAVE IT ALONE! FIGHT ME INSTEAD!

    Goes prone

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  • [–] 8 points 8 months ago

    Well... Who won?

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  • [–] 31 points 8 months ago* (3 children)

    In the criminal justice system, harassment of marine mammals is considered a Florida-tier offense. In Miami-Dade, the detectives who investigate these bizarre aquatic crimes are members of an elite squad known as the Meth-Adjacent Intervention Unit. These are their stories.

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago

    I'm going to have to see the video

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  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

    Oh no here comes the manatee from the top rope with a steel chair! Oof! As god as my witness she is broken in half!

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  • [–] 5 points 8 months ago

    Picture is AI

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  • [–] 16 points 8 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 9 points 8 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 4 points 8 months ago

    Musk is responsible for this. Remember a few weeks ago when he made Grok put everyone in bikinis? Of course, Florida is now copying it IRL. And as usual, it's the poor bloody matinee ... mantit ... blobbly wobblies that suffer!

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago

    I've never seen a manatee in a parrk, if I did I would also wrestle it in a bikini.

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  • [–] 2 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    Just let me get my manatee costume...

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  • [–] 1 point 8 months ago
    [–] 0 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (5 children)

    This is AI slop

    edit: to people who downvote me because she's cute : Just look at the logo

    and then search online for "WFor 4 News", it doen't exist

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  • [–] 3 points 8 months ago (3 children)

    Dunno. When it comes to Florida folks, sometimes it is hard to tell AI slop from reality.

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  • [–] 0 points 8 months ago (2 children)

    No it's not. I mean, maybe if you're dumb and can't recognize fake shit, which, from the looks of this comment thread, it appears Lemmy has started down that path.

    It's the "in a bikini" part that's a dead giveaway. That's not a detail that would be included in a real headline. That's extra added to make the situation seem more ridiculous and silly. It's crazy I even have to point this out, its painfully obvious to me.

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