your ex friend was overreacting. Hetero is not offensive as far as I know.

It absolutely isn’t but that doesn’t stop certain idiots from pretending like it is. Same with cis people who don’t like being called “cis” because they want to believe they’re the default and any language that identifies them as otherwise is offensive to them.

Far as I can tell, the sort of people who think "hetero" is a slur (or "cis" for that matter) are bigots who are offended by the thought that non-cishet people even exist.

No. Person sounds like an idiot

(We are ex-friends because of drama [not this], which is kind of a long story, but I guess not the point of the post.)

This actually is the point of your post. Your ex-friend is dramatic and contrarian, and was going to find somethimg to beef with you about.

That is weird shit. To me it sounds like someone looking for an excuse to be angry. Her reaction is a non sequitur.

Some folks are just looking for excuses to be offended, you shouldn't worry about those sort of folks because they will be mad no matter what.

I mean... It could be if the person you called hetero is actually gay. Are you sure this person is straight?

No.

It is, but only in the eyes of people who think anything else doesn't exist.

They get offended because they equate hetero with homo. One was used as a slur. Still often is. "Bringing the other to the same level" won't make hetero as big of a slur - it'll merely normailze the original.

And normalization of the other is the real reason thise types get upset.

It's not a slur, but I think the way you worded your joke might have come off in a way that made her feel like you were using it as a slur.

No, and not even the people pretending that cis is a slur act like it is.

Either she's just a garden variety bitch or you didn't pick up on her own joke...

And also your own attempt at a joke or whatever sucked.