The guy ahead of me is taking forever to decide what he wants, and he's also facing the wrong direction. Oh shit that's the cashier and I've been staring at him in silence for 20 minutes

I love when you practice it in your head about forty-three times and when you get up to the head of the line you awkwardly smile for an embarrassingly long period of time before you realize you didn't actually say anything yet.

Thinking: Can I get a Big Mac with pickles and to drink a small coke?

Speaking: Can I get a big man who tickles a small twink on coke?^1^

This is where I go wrong, I practice it, I’ll mess it up, I just have to wing it, 60% success rate

I'll get whatever the person behind me ordered

hello i would like a burgget meal

"I'll have two #9s, a #9 large, a #6 with extra dip, a #7, two #45s, one with cheese, and a large soda."

haven't seen a line in McDonald's in years, you have to use those god awful kiosks

I've been high in public just once. Had a friend take me on a random adult playdate. We had a sober chaperone and the rest of us were enjoying that 2008 farm bill. It was simultaneously the most interesting and terrifying time I've ever had. It was nice to just exist and attempt to talk like a rational human with friends who knew what was going on, but any time someone else (like a waiter) tried to interact with me, I turned into the OP image and was like "Just act normal!"

Was a neat experience that I will never repeat.

practicing my order in my head

And that smile slowly fades away as every person in front of you never bothered to check the menu whole waiting in line so you end up standing there for 10 minutes

Nothing more human than self defining as ape like and monstrous but capable of chill exchanges

Yeah i'll have two number nines, a number nine large, a number SIX with EXTRA DIP! Two number forty fives, one with cheese and a large soda

Widdly scuds?

Cheese preenish

Tell me more about these beef wings…

I think this song might be.....as the kids say....... a banger

Its like a bell curve but instead the y axis is your iq(or i guess it should be eq in this case) and the x axis is your age. When i was small i was always nervous ordering so i would practice it in my head, then i grew up and became better at it and stopped being anxious and then even later i started ordering at the local pizzeria while high as hell which basically circled back to me being 8 💀

I do that irrespectively of the current degree of high

I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda.

And driving a car. . . .