I can speak from experience here - one of our friend group, we'd been good friends for years without red flags that any of us noticed, was very credibly accused of rape, and we believed the victim's story. None of us are still friends with the rapist any more. This is a good thing. Don't remain friends with "friends that have made huge mistakes" if those "mistakes" have permanently traumatized victims and the "friend" turns out to be a fucking predator. That's what we're talking about under a Marilyn Manson story, not a "could happen to anyone" forgivable mistake.

That was aimed at your first paragraph. I agree with your second paragraph.