I need to start wearing this spare wedding ring I have out places then (I think it was my dad's lol).

Me: *Asks out the degenerate homewrecker who thinks she's flirting with a married man.*

Her: "But aren't you married?"

Me: "No why?"

Her: *Points to ring*

Me: "Oh this? I just think it's neat! Makes me feel like a Hobbit."