14
[Trigger Warning: Suicide]... Parents, how would you feel if your child died by suicide? (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 10 months ago by to c/asklemmy@lemmy.world
NSFW 35 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Sorry if this is inappropriate to ask, I have morid curiosity and I need to know how parents feel.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] 11 points 10 months ago (11 children)

Are you safe? Do you need help? I’ve ran across your posts from time to time and most of them are concerning to me.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • hideshow 11 child comments
    •
  • [–] [S] 6 points 10 months ago (10 children)

    I post the dark thoughts online so I can clear my mind of those thoughts, to "process" those thoughts.

    I mean I wouldn't dare say this to a therapist, I'd get involuntarily committed, which would just make me even more depressed.

    Last time I asked this question to my mom, she got mad at me.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 10 child comments
    •
  • [–] 5 points 10 months ago

    I mean I wouldn't dare say this to a therapist, I'd get involuntarily committed, which would just make me even more depressed.

    Being involuntarily committed requires a present danger to yourself or others. Curiosity is not that. Talk to a therapist, it can really help.

    (Also, for what it’s worth, being committed can really help. I spent a few days in a mental health ward and, while I wanted nothing more than to get out at the time, it ended up being very good for me. Unfortunately it also meant I started avoiding talking to a therapist, like you’re doing. I regret that result immensely, therapy is too useful.)

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 4 points 10 months ago (2 children)

    Sometimes being committed isn't a bad thing. It's not pleasant to think about, but the process exists for a reason.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
    •
  • [–] 2 points 10 months ago (5 children)

    Is your mom ever NOT mad at you? You should try to stop assuming that everyone is as unstable as her.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 5 child comments
    •
  • [–] [S] 3 points 10 months ago* (4 children)

    Its a very weird love-hate relationship.

    Right now she tells me she loves me. (which according to the internet, is apparantly uncommon for Chinese parents?)

    But if I mention suicidal feelings, oh shit that is like nuclear war.

    So I just don't talk about it anymore.

    That's the thing, its so taboo to talk about, society expects you to hide it.

    If you talk to people about it, they will distance themselves from you and not wanna be your friend. Of if they are already your "friend", you're gonna be a burden, like emotionally, and so they would distamce themself from you, probably.

    So these topics really just get buried and hidden away to some dark corner of the internet, here.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 4 child comments
    •
  • [–] 4 points 10 months ago

    Right now she tells me she loves me. (which according to the internet, is apparantly uncommon for Chinese parents?)

    But if I mention suicidal feelings, oh shit that is like nuclear war.

    Yeah, most people want their kids to live. If the kid tells them they are considering dying, it's reasonable for alarm bells to ring in the parents' head and to behave irrationally in a panic state.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 3 points 10 months ago

    Honestly, I don't know how I would react if one of my kids told me something like that. I obviously would want to prevent it, but I don't think it would be an angry reaction. Mom might just not know how to deal with problems without fighting them aggressively.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • [–] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 child)

    But if I mention suicidal feelings, oh shit that is like nuclear war.

    Yeah, even if not helpful for you probably, that's a pretty normal parent response to a threat like that. I'm not being sarcastic here. It's not an indication that they don't love or value you, rather the exact opposite.

    My personal recommendation to you is that you should be very careful what anonymous people in the internet tell you when the context is this important. Some people just don't give a shit about the well-being of anyone and will actively try to make things worse for you.

    Get professional help.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
    •
  • [–] 2 points 10 months ago

    It’s not an indication that they don’t love or value you, rather the exact opposite.

    100%. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's apathy. A parent who reacts that strongly still cares about you on some level, however messed up their way of expressing it may be. A parent who would shrug and continue watching tv, on the other hand, is beyond redemption.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent