Chicago style is a kiddie pool of a crust filled with an alarming miasma of sauce and toppings (bafflingly, placed under the sauce). It’s more of a “savory pie” than a “pizza-pie”. Great for if you want to drown a toddler in a food item; not so great for folding up and eating as you walk around town.

They can be tasty. I just object to them being classified with the rest of the pizza genus, because they’re wildly different in terms of construction to any other pizza species.