[–] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Start by deleting social media from your phone, make it so it's really inconvenient to get in there.
If you can't afford to close your accounts then log out of the web brower's websites and change the password to something randomly generated that you only have on your computer so you can only log in there when needed. You can still access the chats using something like Beeper.

Find things to replace the doomscrolling with. Short simple games that actually help your brain like Tetris, Sudoku, and/or word games - I've been really enjoying Blossom Word Search, it's really calming and satisfying.

Get books that are about topics you care about or enjoy, doesn't matter how good they are or if they provide any actual value.. reading books will help you regain your attention span and reading comprehension skills while keeping you away from screens. You can set tiny goals like reading two pages without getting distracted and then grow it to 5, a chapter, and so on. Put your phone on do not disturb while you read or leave it in another room. Visit your local library, they're free!

Physical excercise will do wonders for your brain too. I personally love rope climbing in a gym and recently started doing parkour too. It's a fun way of excercising and building community. Find a sport that calls to you and start by doing it one time a week, even if you suck, we all start somewhere. It's much easier if you join other people already doing it, look for local groups that practice it. You don't have to step foot in a regular boring gym.

Anything you do start with small achievable goals and then build them up as that becomes easier. If you get distracted or start going back into old habits it's ok, just stop and get back to it as you catch yourself. Eventually it'll become easier.

Oh and do not use LLMs to get answers. Use a search engine like Duck Duck Go with AI turned off. Researching skills are super important and LLMs can really liquify your brain, they take away your creativity and critical thinking skills.

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  • [–] 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 child)

    White bread (I know it's not the healthiest but that's what I like) Hummus Avocado Sprouts Salt, black pepper, paprika Tomato if feeling fancy

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  • [–] 1 point 3 weeks ago*

    I see. If it's women that are her managers pressuring her into doing it then it's just internalized misogyny, she's not being pressured to be eye candy but those women pressuring her into it were on their time and never did the internal work to understand what was happening and why such regulations are backwards and pointless for actual professionalism. In any case I don't know your friend's situation, I'm just talking about the most common and prevalent situations. I was pressured by women to dress certain ways too, "you won't find a husband/job if you sit like that or don't wear make up or don't wear dresses", "heels would look so good on you!" (I'm quite short), "that's not very feminine of you", blah blah, it's just things that they were drilled into believing until they stopped questioning them and then they repeat it to the next generation / their peers.

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  • [–] 2 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

    ooof then yeah, she's being pressured into being eye candy for the managers, disgusting

    And yep, the only people that care about such things are the wrong people. I had a lawyer show up to an online meeting with me with like a white t-shirt or something super casual like that, he apologized, I couldn't have cared less because either way he's super polite and I'm there to get his knowledge and not have him look good for me.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 weeks ago

    I didn't intend to come across dismissive or hostile, and I agree with you on the rest of what you're saying. If it was my language that's just how I express myself, truly, as I have strong feelings about this, it is something that has been beaten into me since the moment I started to have opinions about how I dress myself because me choosing the options that men have is too much to ask of society. Also, regardless of what your intentions were that comparison felt a bit out of touch. I think a much better example on how patriarchy affects men negatively is the social isolation and the "men don't cry". But saying that being forced into pants because it's hot when I'm talking about being forced into being eye candy since we're little girls and literally screwing up our bone structures is not a fair comparison and totally missing the point. As if I said that a slap on the face hurts as much as being kicked in the balls.

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  • [–] 8 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

    Yeah, you still cannot compare "I'm a bit hot in these pants" to "you need to be eye candy and pretend you aren't bothered by men oogling at you while you're forced to treat them nicely" or "fuck your spine and feet bone structure so you look nice for men" though. (Those high heels not only mess up your feet, they also mess up your spine) I took the "I'm a bit hot in 35C degree weather and the school keeps taking me out of classes to tell me I'm ruining my future" as a 10 year old kid over using a skirt every day. I believe grown men can deal with wearing pants that they can still choose the cloth of.

    But yes, patriarchy definitely affects men too, neither of us have any need to be dealing with this nonsense. Feminism is not just for women's rights.

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  • [–] 7 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

    yeah... "a lot of pressure" translates to "you don't get hired" if it's clear you'll refuse or make a fuss about it or "they make your job painful every day" if you're already hired and refuse. It depends on the industry and company but it's pretty standard in most customer facing jobs. It was much worse 20 years ago than it is today

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  • [–] 43 points 3 weeks ago* (13 children)

    They're just one more way to control women.

    There could be a whole dissertation written about this and I'm not gonna go there in a Lemmy Shitpost comment section. But I will say: "Women choose to wear them" - yes, and society has forced us in many ways by making it part of uniforms and being drilled into us since we're little kids that we need to conform if we want to succeed. I say 'we' because I'm a woman but I have never worn shoes like that and I never will, it has caused me issues to reject such standards. I'm lucky I chose a career where I've always been allowed to wear pants and sneakers instead of skirts and heels. When I was in primary school I would constantly get kicked out of class and sent to the principal's office because I chose to wear the uniform's winter pants during summer instead of skirts, couldn't wear the boy's shorts. Because me following the rules but refusing to wear a skirt was more important than me getting an education. "What will you do when you get a job?", "nobody will want to hire you with that attitude"... Men don't realize how much women's bodies are controlled from the moment we're born. It's gotten better in the last years but shit like that still happens more than yall realize.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 weeks ago

    Haven't checked myself but a while back someone told me you can still find the posts and comments if you search for the user. So that basically just adds an extra step

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    Hello! I was previously running these online courses through the Canadian school VFS' Short Circuit but have decided to focus on self-hosting my content more (in so many ways, I've been learning so much back-end these days, it's hard work to the surprise of no one) so now you can register for them through my website: https://erikamoya.com/intro-to-blender-classes/ https://erikamoya.com/intro-to-vfx-classes/ They're both aimed for beginners, live classes where we do work together, you can ask questions and get feedback in-between classes as well, limited to 7 students per group to assure no one gets left behind. The courses are aimed at teaching the technical knowledge of using the software plus good practices so you have all the tools needed to work by yourself and improve your craft through practice and feedback. With Blender I teach the whole generalist pipeline so students can get an understanding of areas that maybe they didn't have any idea on what they meant or they would like before starting (like rigging for example), also helpful for those that are looking to switch from Maya to Blender. I invite you to look at the pages I've written to see more about what each covers. Humble bragging but previous students have told me they really enjoyed the classes ;p I'll still be working with VFS occasionally teaching other topics, like maybe perhaps an introduction to freelancing course in a few months.

    [Microblog] Hello! (media.kbin.earth)
     

    Hello! I'm offering live (remote) classes for beginners to learn the generalist (modelling, UVing, texturing, materials, rigging, animation, rendering..) pipeline in Blender with an intensive crash course for those interested :)

    https://erikamoya.com/intro-to-blender-classes/

    I have taught this course through the school VFS before but am just starting to self host it. Humble bragging but lots of students have told me they really like the way I teach and enjoyed the classes :p

     

    Hi, my name is Erika and I'm based in Vancouver, Canada. I have +10 years of experience as a 3D generalist and 6 years as a VFX artist with several launched titles like DOOM The Dark Ages, Dauntless, and Flintlock. Focused on stylized projects. As a generalist I can: 3D model, texture, rig, and animate. As a VFX artist I can: create particle systems, shaders, and set up lighting and post-processing. I'm proficient with Unreal, Godot, and Unity and their respective scripting languages (blueprints, gdscript, c#). You can see my work here: https://erikamoya.com/

     

    I finally bit the bullet and I'm giving Linux a second try, installed with dual boot a few days ago and making Linux Mint my default from now on.

    There are a lot of guides and tips about the before and during the transition but not for after, so I was hoping to find some here.

    Some example questions but I would like to hear any other things that come to mind:

    I read that with Mint if you have a decent computer you don't need to do a swap partition? So I skipped that, but I'm not sure if I'd want to modify that swap file to make it bigger, is that just for giving extra ram if my hardware one is full? Because I have 48GB of ram and if I look into my System Monitor it says Swap is not available.

    Was looking at this other post, and the article shared (about Linux security) seems so daunting, it's a lot. How much of it do I have to learn as a casual user that's not interested in meddling with the system much? Is the default firewall good enough to protect me from my own self to at least some degree? I was fine with just Windows Defender and not being too stupid about what I download and what links I click.

    I was also reading about how where you install your programs or save your data matters, like in particular partitions or folders, is that just like hardcore min-maxing that's unnecessary for the average user that doesn't care to wait half a second extra or is it actually relevant? I'm just putting stuff in my Home folder.

    Connected to the last two points: in that Linux Hardening Guide lemmy post I shared the TL;DR includes "Move as much activity outside the core maximum privilege OS as possible"... how do I do that? is that why people have separate partitions?

    Downloaded the App Center (Snap Store) and I was surprised there was even a file saying to not allow it... why is that? Is it not recommended? Is it better to download stuff directly from their websites instead?

     

    Just the title but here's what prompted me to ask:

    My mom is coming to visit and even tho I've made it clear I don't like non-vegan products in my house she pushes for me to let her have at least milk for her coffee. Last time she came with my brother they got something with meat delivered because I was in bed puking my guts out. When talking soon after me going vegan she said her pregnancy state felt super good so surely the cows aren't suffering that much... etc...

    So I've thought of a great way to fight that back non-confrontationally and helping her understand: in order to bring a product in she has to watch a video with me. I'm hoping to watch a whole documentary during her visit but I think shorter videos would be more feasible.

    Speaking of, I have never watched a whole documentary or in a very long time, didn't need them, if you had to choose one which would you choose?

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