[–] 9 points 1 week ago (1 child)

Hey there Daria.

There are some pretty heavy things on your plate. It can be really discouraging when it feels like ya just can't catch a break.

BUT. You are doing a great job. You're working hard to improve the situation. You're supporting your wife through her (also very heavy) issues.

COBRA sucks, for how expensive it is. It's also super helpful in situations like the one you're facing. Good job for keeping up with it, and i know its not easy.

As regards the job search


also a crap situation. I don't pretend to know the details of your field or education. Maybe it would be appropriate to consider work in adjacent or similar roles. Or maybe a less senior role than your goal.

On the other hand, that might not be appropriate, but I trust you to consider all of your options.

Possibly even, depending on other factors like time and home responsibilities, a "throwaway" job like retail orcoffer shop. Having some income is a huge step up from none. There can also be pretty powerful emotional benefits to doing something as well. When i was a young man in a foreign land and found myself working in a fried chicken fastfood place .... an old man saw me one day and I guess he noticed that I was feeling bad about it all. He said something like "don't ever be ashamed of honest work". Those words did not take the stink of fryer grease out of my hair, but they did stay with me in a positive way.

Don't let any part time work interfere or delay your real-job search though. And maybe this isn't the right approach, its just an idea.

You might consider going with your wife to the oncologists office at whatever hospital y'all are using. Look to speak with one of the social workers there about your insurance/cobra situation. Those folks often have good knowledge of 'the system' and might be able to help in your planning. It is okay to go and see them before things are really desperate

Above all, remember that you ARE loved and you ARE doing the right things and I am genuinely proud of you for sticking with it, supporting your family and also for reaching out to ask for help. You deserve (and are awarded) hugs each day.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 week ago

    Its even worse than that.

    The state literally mailed other parts of the victims body back to her mother --years later and unannounced and unmarked.

    In don't recall the exact parts, but it was extremely fuckn callous

    Sorry about the cancer website, but it seems an in depth article and published before the recent debacle

    https://www.unilad.com/news/crime/christa-pike-victims-mother-details-16-year-battle-to-recover-remains-297681-20260918

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  • [–] 1 point 1 week ago

    Its all praxis-by-wishing

    LOTS of people and institutions failed that woman, but none of that excuses or justifies the murder

    In my view, the saddest part of all of this is how vile and hateful the victims mother has become. She did some interviews and it is extremely clear that she has been waiting anxiously for the execution for 30 years. She has carried that bile and venom so close for so long that its obviously unhealthy.

    If Christa Pike had just been sentenced to life without parole 30/years ago, this woman could have spent that time healing.

    Instead she has been stewing. It looks awfule when you watch her speak

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago

    What national or statewide race has an anti-trans Democrat who is NOT running against an even-worse Republican??

    Is there Democratic candidate somewhere that's running against another, anti-transDemocrat?

    Running unopposed? Nah, bug doubt on that.

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  • [–] 3 points 2 weeks ago

    Sometime, as a little treat for yourself, see if you can huff the whiff of nearly pure CO² gasthat forms in the neck of a coke bottle when it is first opened.

    That little whisp of vapor.

    It's neat to see how carbon dioxide feels to breathe.

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