Something about the way of writing made me, honestly, for a moment, think that your dad was gonna show up and beat you with a set of jumper cables.

As someone who thinks the world would be a better place without little shits chucking cans of green beans at people's heads I'm shaking my head, but my inner former retail worker is cheering for the (possibly made up for a joke) little shit with the impressive aim.

Missing the gloves, but still

Okay, those I get. But the handcuffs? You handcuff Your little sister to the radiator... so she doesn't bother You while you're playing Fortnite, right?

That doesn't sound cleanable. Just invest in legit one that can be cleaned. But I guess teenagers can't buy sex toys.

Honestly there should be some sex toys available to teenagers.

Like smaller vibrators. Fleshlights. Cause anything too big could be too risky for kids.

But I feel like teenage libido should be acknowledged and they should be given options.

TIL

No no no.......the wife requested the pringles can. Your dick goes inside. You get handcuffed to the bed. She gets more girth, you feel nothing.

Then she plays fortnite while sitting on your face. She uses the lotion to wank you, but stops everytime you get close. Then she gives you the sponges, and you can clean the house.

Not sure what that blurry orange bag is. I'm sure it's kinky.