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[–] 260 points 5 months ago (17 children)

Maybe the dude was just... you know.

Poor.

Came from an environment that was usually a mess, chaotic, disordered, and he was genuienly impressed by how simple things, in order, can give a significant sense of safety and stability.

Maybe he'd never seen that before, maybe he had no model of a tidy and peaceful living space.

The same scenario could happen with anyone, of any sex or gender.

Man, broad societal levels of narcissism are just off the fucking charts these days... its the literal opposite of solidarity, of empathy.

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  • [–] 70 points 5 months ago* (6 children)

    Or maybe he was just being nice? I can't imagine being invited to friend's new house and not giving compliments unless im like worried about them moving into an unsafe situation.

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  • [+] -29 points 5 months ago (5 children)

    Sure, maybe he was being performatively praising when he didn't actually care that much at all about the home's decor itself, but wanted to affirm the resident's decor choice regardless.

    Aka 'being nice'.

    Maybe a million different possible things.

    Why do you imagine its a new house, like the resident just moved there?

    You could just... be going to someone's home for the first time. Maybe they've lived there for years, maybe they just moved in, who knows?

    My point here is that there's a lot of additional context required for your interpretation. Your interpretation also manufactures and then ascribes an intent.

    My interpretation only requires that men who were raised poor exist, and does not manufacture or ascribe an intent.

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  • [–] 32 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    What a bunch of argumentative bullshit. Have fun being contrarian. 🙄

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  • [–] 88 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    Growing up my house was always trashed. Parents with depression and full time jobs don't leave much time and energy for cleaning up, and there's only so much children without guidance can do.

    So once I had my own defined space, it was basically minimalist to expedite cleaning. I didn't start getting more stuff, even clothes, until my partner moved in.

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  • [–] 24 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    Me growing up, it wasn't quite that bad for myself, but some of my neighbors were from... way more fucked up families.

    They had basically this exact same 'Wow.' moment, just... coming over, and seeing that... order was possible, things could be put basically back in place after use, etc.

    They had no previous concept of it.

    I remember going over to one of their houses once and literally stepping in dogshit, inside.

    They just... forgot to let the dog out, I guess. Regularly enough that this was annoying but basically normal.

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  • [–] 4 points 5 months ago*

    if he was poor then he's an asshole for having been poor.

    people don't have empathy for people who are poor. just malice.

    I live an upper middle class lifestyle in my 40s. i haven't been poor for 20+ years, and yet for some people, it's considered something you can never live down, it's an original sin from which you can't ever be washed clean. you would be amazed at how openly hostile and violent people are towards those who are not as economically fortune as they are. rich and privileged people do not regard the poor and middle-class as human beings.

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  • [+] -7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    Oh hey!

    It's that user.

    The user who types.

    They type like this.

    I don't really know why.

    But they loves single sentence paragraphs.

    It's not a problem.

    I just don't get why they do it.

    Maybe they're trying to build suspense?

    Idk it's just so...

    ...mysterious...

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  • [–] 55 points 5 months ago

    Like yes, i want a mommy to take care of me but that and me appreciating your house is not related 💀

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  • [–] 104 points 5 months ago (8 children)

    Art on the wall? Rugs? I'm from Eastern Europe, best I can do is rugs on the wall

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  • [–] 22 points 5 months ago (3 children)
  • [–] 88 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    Thanks! I’ve put a bit of work into the place lately

    Pretty difficult to say, I know.

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  • [–] -2 points 5 months ago

    I've been over to places and complimented people on them, and they become hostile to you.

    because in their warped mind, your compliment is an veiled attack on them. and they think you liking their rug is you telling them it isn't good enough or something.

    this is typical of massively insecure people.

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  • [–] 62 points 5 months ago (19 children)
  • [–] 16 points 5 months ago (18 children)

    i've had women come over to my place and do this. and then tell me it made them uncomfortable because men are not supposed to be able to cook, clean, let alone decorate.

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  • [–] 27 points 5 months ago* (4 children)

    An example of women perpetuating toxic masculinity

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  • [–] -1 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

    no, when they do that they are just 'expressing a preference for a manly man'.

    and if you tell them how problematic (and self-defeating usually) their ideas are, they tell you how you just hate all women and you have no right to criticize their 'preferences' and clearly you are insecure and pathetic.

    this same technique is also used to justify rabid racism against non-white men all the time. It's always amazed me how women hide behind the 'patriarchy' and their 'oppression' only to rapidly perpetuate the rapidly racist and sexist nonsense they happen to believe in. I've also been on some date with women of color who do this, it's not like restricted to white women.

    What I will say is the women who do do this... are typically privileged and wealthy types whose main dispute with life is they are NOT privileged and wealthy enough... and that it's an evil and oppressive society of awful men that is preventing them form making an extra 50-100K on their already 300K salary.

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  • [–] 11 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (11 children)

    keep being you and i promise theres women out there to appreciate it

    fully retracted, your honor lol

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  • [–] -4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (10 children)

    the women who appreciate it are not attracted to me sexually. or they are already married. i have had plenty of female friends who admire my home and my cooking. but i've never been in a sexual relationship with a lady who saw it as a positive, only as a threat.

    the issue with dating that people really struggle to be honest about, is most of us have limited options in potential partners, and it's either accept what's available, or date nobody. i know exactly who would work for me to date, but sadly none of those women find me attractive, and the one who do find me attractive, are the ones who i have absolutely nothing in common with, and who think my lifestyle choices and values make me a closeted homosexual.

    and yeah i'd rather be alone than be in another relationship with someone who constantly makes jokes about how i'm secretly gay and i'm going to leave her for a man, or what a pussy I am for being human and being upset over events like the death of my parents. but that's the type of woman who finds me attractive and wants to date me.

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  • [–] 21 points 5 months ago (9 children)

    i have seen your comments about dating in the past and i gotta say you seem like the problem. some of the things you have said are straight up misogynist. sorry if i dont believe this is the norm

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  • [+] -12 points 5 months ago* (8 children)

    Right, it's me that hates women, and it's not you that's sexist and making sexist generalizations based on a total lack of personal experience with men, which you do not regard as human beings, no doubt.

    you know who also tells me I hate all women? every shitty abusive girlfriend I have rejected or stood up to.

    and what's funny, is the women i meet who weren't that way, don't tend to call me misogynist when I reject or refute them.

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  • [–] 17 points 5 months ago

    As a man with successful and healthy relationships who has read a lot of your bullshit throughout a lot of these kinds of threads, you are 100% the problem person in your life and relationships.

    Stop blaming other people for your shitty behavior. You’re the one behind the wheel.

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  • [–] 8 points 5 months ago (5 children)

    you know nothing about me lmao but thanks for proving my point. 

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  • [–] -4 points 5 months ago* (4 children)

    you know nothing about me, how is your belief about me legitimate, by your own logic then?

    all you really know is i said words you don't like. you self-reported as never dating men, so I find it kind of ironic that you seem to think you know anything about being in relationships with them.

    are you sure I hate women, or is it more that you just hate men, because you don't see them as people, as you have no personal experience in intimate relationships with them?

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  • [–] 6 points 5 months ago (3 children)

    i never said i havent dated men, i said i am not attracted to them.   i am still good friends with my only serious exboyfriend who kept his space neat and clean, helps raise his sisters children, takes care of his elderly parents, and is confident enough in his sexuality not to be enraged at being perceived as gay (he isnt) for doing the things he enjoys.

    i never said you hate all women, i said your comment history is misogynist, which it is. i am free to form opinions about you based on your own words, like the thread where you were bitching about the women you date want fancy date nights, amd when you were told to maybe try dating within your league, you said you werent interested in poor women. lol all of these crashout responses are giving insecure manchild.

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  • [+] -9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

    You are the type of woman I date. The rules apply to me, but not to you. Your judgements of me are truthful and accurate and correct, but mine of you are false and fake and stupid and wrong.

    And I just laugh at the irony of how smug and condescending and arrogant you are here, but you don't see yourself that way at all. I'm just a dumb stupid guy who should just listen to you and my life would be magically perfect... and if I don't agree with that, then I'm a insecure manchild. Becuase if I was a secure and confident guy, I'd never challenge you or disagree with you, because you are clearly perfect or something.

    And I think it's complete bullshit. All I see is someone who twists my word and stories to fill in their weird sexist gender assumptions because it makes them feel big to shit on random internet people and offer 'advice' where none was asked for or wanted.

    and for the record, I've love to date a 'poor' woman. They don't exist in my city or my state, because the cost of living is highest in the USA. Poor people literally cannot afford to live here. I would like to date someone who is roughly my financial equal, but I understand that in 2026 that's 'misogyny', or so I have been inform repeatedly both on the internet and IRL by many women, because any expectation of financial equality between men adn women is considered a hostile act or something now, though 20 years ago it was considered pretty normal.

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  • [–] 7 points 5 months ago (1 child)

    I was going to leave a comment trying to reason with you, but upon rereading your comments, you honestly just sound like an incel who is incapable of self reflection. Keep grasping at straws and maybe one day you'll find one to make you happy.

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  • [–] -5 points 5 months ago*

    right, you are so reasonable that your comment to me is to just insult me.

    did it occur to you that 'reasoning' in the form of lecturing other people via your unsolicited advice about their life, based on some random internet comments they make, doesn't make you at all a helpful useful or good human being? and in fact, probably the opposite?

    seriously, think about this. If I went into your post history, and started making judgements and conclusions about you, and started lecturing you about how 'faulty' you were as a person and how 'unhappy' you were. what would you think that? would you be happy and grateful and go 'wow thanks random stranger from the internet, gosh golly gee, you sure told me and now i will listen to your random, generic, ignorant advice about my life and it will magically be happy and wonderful'

    No. But your 'empathy' here is only for your own egotistical delusion that you know better than me how my life is and ought to be. and your conclusion that my commentary on gender issues i have experienced means I am 'unhappy' and 'incapable of self reflection'. oh really, and what you know the magic secret to happiness and self-reflection?

    what is self reflection to you really, other than agreement with your experiences, your beliefs, your life. Does it ever occur to you that other people exist who share none of those things with you? or is that 'problematic' for you, and you feel the need to browbeat, harass, and demand that such other people not exist, or at least not express those differences you find so 'offensive'.

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