Lol, enjoy the upvote.

But that would be a trident, no?

what would we call a ?

No, a three tined fork is a tiny trident

We've been calling them that for decades. Where have you been?

Trident

So chop-sticks are "Oneks"

Sheldon was right, it's a Trident.

What about a “thork”?

That thing you use to poke at stuff on the grill is called a toque. A spear is a onek (pronounced "wunk")

Only if the fork can be called a fourk.

it would be a rake if its more than 4.

A fork in the streets…

A threk*

It's "fork" not "fourk", so removing a letter should be a rule.

*Thrike

Fish (plural) should be fiish/feesh

We have two-pronged campfire sticks that we call twoks.