I like to call this the "professional" tone, because it's exactly what those in professions like lawyers, accountants, doctors, etc do, especially if they have problematic clients.

Your job is to advise, not to actually change people. You really need to repeatedly ask them guiding questions. If they are unreceptive of authority, then you need to make them feel as if they arrived at the conclusion themselves (management consults are experts at this).

This does not mean you need to be a pushover; in fact you need to remain calm, and firm.

This is the approach that has been scientifically proven to work, most recently in convincing anti vaxxers.

How to speak to a vaccine sceptic: research reveals what works - https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-025-01771-z

Someone in a profession with difficult clients described their job to me as basically being a babysitter for overgrown children, which I think is a very healthy way to mentally cope, process, and approach such situations.

Thank you. It's always unfortunate when people try to logic people out of positions that didn't logic themselves into. I used to do things like that, but it'd probably be riskier to try now with my current outward identity. Even if I get them to listen to a brown woman, I'm also trans and bi which could easily shut them out if I conceal it, and would make me even harder to approach if I don't. I hope others can do it for me.

This is the sort of thing that needs copy-pasta'd!

THANK YOU for making this the first logical comment I've seen on Lemmy for a while. THIS IS THE WAY!