Thanks, I hate it.

Why do children always exchange bishop and knight?

With the rank and file labels added, you could have flipped the board, or even rotated it by 90°

Hey kid you might be better at this child's game than me (what did you call it again chest? what oh chess? ha a terrible name to try to market) but guess what kid there won't be any ice left for penguins before you even get your first grey hair

I lean in close for this part of the monologue to emphasize the wisdom of my words to the camera

Look kid I don't recommend psychedelics to kids as a rule, which is why reality becoming a bad trip makes this fantasy combat battle game easy for me. Ah you think chess is your ally? You merely adopted the chess. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see chess pieces until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but blinding!

Checkmate

My cousin smiles and wanders away from their strange uncle

apparently my little cousin would do better than i do