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[–] 18 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Any time I snap my fingers I am magically cleaned and groomed head to toe and any clothes I’m wearing get cleaned too.

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  • [–] 7 points 4 days ago (1 child)

    dam i was gonna say something about traveling really fast but thats way better. i pick that too. it would be soooo nice to snap my fingers and be clean all over, have perfectly painted nails, makeup, body shaven, eyebrows plucked and shaped, hair styled, skin exfoliated and moisturized, cute outfit magically on without having to squeeze into it, and jewelry all on and situated.

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  • [–] 5 points 3 days ago (3 children)

    The word "no" works first time on a man.

    I'm not even talking about sex stuff either. I have a follow up meeting tomorrow that pretty much boils down to "I haven't changed my mind, we're only here because you wouldn't take no for an answer"

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  • [–] 4 points 3 days ago (2 children)

    I remember a colleague (note: not boss, just a colleague) who was constantly "assigning" work to random people in the office. He tried it with me. I just took his "assignment" memo, the one he wrote up after I said "no" orally, crumpled it up and tossed it in the wastebin. "No means no."

    I can't fathom what goes through the heads of these people other than, I don't know, a lot of echoes from the empty space.

    Stay strong in the meeting. Continue with "no". It's a word men need to hear more often from women.

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  • [–] 5 points 3 days ago

    Oooo I’d take the opportunity to get rid of my disabilities. Never having to deal with rheumatoid arthritis, gout, being legally blind, asthma and ADHD ever again would be amazing.

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  • I'd say a plush shark, but maybe that's too iirl.

    A tool to instantly clean up my apartment would be peak, that please, but @Potocobe's suggestion is a great 2nd voice.

    Or maybe a pet? I'm too worried about the commitment to go out of my way to get one.

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  • [–] 5 points 3 days ago (1 child)

    A billion euros would come in handy. But otherwise I would go with instant freshly-cooked healthy meals.

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  • [–] 4 points 3 days ago

    Whenever I'm at a bus stop, metro station, etc. the ride is exactly 15s away.

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  • [–] 3 points 3 days ago
    [–] 2 points 3 days ago

    Why not use that and gain general magic powers that you can use in multiple areas of your life?

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  • [–] 2 points 3 days ago

    Magic my wallet so it always has money.

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  • [–] 1 point 3 days ago

    Always cleaned and put away laundry.

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