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[–] 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

All characters are Dosney characters in the real world, but the real answer is Gaston. 6389

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  • [–] 11 points 2 weeks ago (14 children)

    That's considered uh rape isn't it?

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 2 weeks ago (11 children)

    Correct. But that's not the question exactly.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 weeks ago (10 children)

    If I don't, what are the Russians threatening to do? You say Disney character, are we talking just a cardboard cutout, a human in a Disneyland costume, or the character as if it existed in real life? If it's the latter, has it been previously determined they have sentience and personhood? Do they even have orifices?

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  • [–] [S] 13 points 2 weeks ago (9 children)

    Thank you for taking this thought experiment seriously.

    Let me first address the "character question". This scenario works with the Who Framed Roger Rabbit logic for 2D characters interacting with our world. However, they are not actors who play their characters (like in the movie), they are exactly what they are in the Disney shows, movies, etc. 3D characters and live-action I think are self-explanatory. They are all sentient and have orifices.

    The Russians are threatening to nuke Belgium if you don't do it.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Can we nuke Belgium anyway?

    Broomstick from Fantasia

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  • [–] 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Depends, can I kill them afterwards?

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  • [–] 7 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

    This would be a good time to remind everyone that the Sarlacc is technically a Disney character.

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  • [–] 7 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    This is confusing. What are we supposed to admit to? That we're Russian? Rapists? Are you the FBI?

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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)
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  • [–] 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (3 children)

    @cabb@lemmy.dbzer0.com wasn't able to post a comment here himself, so he sent me a message for me to relay to you about his disgusting and shameful fantasies!

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  • [–] 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    ???? Complaining about a post that asks for you suggest a character to rape seems pretty normal to me.

    Note also that this is unflaired nsfw

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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago

    Actually it's safe for work. You can imagine a situation where russians try to force you to rape a disney character and your boss can't do anything about it. I'm pretty sure they aren't allowed to read your thoughts so they wouldn't be even aware of you imagining it.

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  • [–] [S] 6 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

    Thanks for engaging. That's disgusting. Some people's minds are just dark.

    Just for posterity, my answer would be to use karate to beat the russians, take their guns, and free all the disney characters.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    Tires had a little debate on the hottest Disney Princess

    https://m.youtube.com/shorts/-y_ypQqmrLQ

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  • [–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    Does Marvel count? Reed Richards has it coming.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    Fantasia brooms is probably the least nightmarish

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  • [–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    My brain said "good lord! that's horrible!" and I started laughing. I am still smiling writing these words. I will not answer. There are no good answers. It is a horrible choice whichever one I choose, so I shan't! (But you already know which one…)

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  • [–] 6 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Why does it need to be against their will?

    Anyway, it's Robin Hood.

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  • [–] [S] 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Because the Russians are evil. The fox one, or russel crowe?

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  • [+] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)
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  • [–] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)
  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

    Instructions unclear: Russians dressed up as disney characters wearing chastity belts.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 child)

    Whichever one is the most evil female character in the Disneyverse.

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