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[–] 67 points 2 months ago (3 children)

The Ring: "I don't even OWN a TV."

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  • [–] 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

    The Burbs: IDGAF what my neighbors are doing and you shouldn't either.

    Evil Dead: Reading Books? I'll wait for the movie.

    Tremors: Leave

    The Purge: Fake wound and blood and inject a paralyzer. Play dead until morning. Wonder if they visited that in the sequels because I have only watched the first.

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  • [–] 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

    I know this is a shitpost but I can't help myself, paralytic drugs also paralyze your diaphragm and only last a few minutes. Pancuronium is the longest lasting paralytic and a single dose will get you 60-90 mins max. Youd spend your time fully conscious while suffocating and be dead before anyone could notice your sweet prosthetic makeup.

    Also, you'd still have a pulse and warmth/color to your skin. Paralytics don't stop your heartbeat, and are know to raise it to dangerous levels or cause dysrhythmias if not carefully controlled. So anything more than a passing glance (assuming you lived long enough for it to matter) would immediately give up the game and you'd be defenseless

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  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago

    I hope you like rock climbing and walking through desert terrain, cuz in Tremors the valley's one exiting road is blocked by a rock slide, so leaving isn't as easy done as it is said.

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  • [–] 17 points 2 months ago

    Now survive Troll you swedish she/they

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  • [–] 14 points 2 months ago
    [–] 12 points 2 months ago (3 children)

    Damn Swedes are horror-proof!

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  • [+] 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 child)
  • [–] 8 points 2 months ago

    Funny Games: Too tired to play, let’s do it tomorrow

    Ready Or Not: Not yet

    Rec: Damn I forgot to press record

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  • [–] 7 points 2 months ago

    ITT people who don't quite get the post

    Know1ng: that's not how you spell it

    It Follows: idk I might be fukt I read pet sematary

    Splice: just tie a knot instead

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  • [–] 6 points 2 months ago (2 children)

    My survival suggestion is, "never assume the monster is dead until you have removed its head from its body."

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  • [–] 5 points 2 months ago

    weird sounds in the basement or attic?

    I'm not going

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  • [–] 5 points 2 months ago (2 children)

    Seven: Idgaf about catholicism but this one really fucked me up.

    It's probably not even a real horror movie for some; I'm just not for this genre at all.

    The Fly (80s version) is one of the few I watched. Also really fucked me up. Help me OOP: how could I have survived it?

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  • [–] 2 points 2 months ago* (1 child)

    For the fly, find Janeway, she will make it her mission to kill both of the hybrid entities, which might result in you going back to normal.

    Edit: Or it might result in Janeway becoming like Jason and always slowly walking towards you with a machete. At which point I think you need to recruit Freddy to deal with her.

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  • [–] 4 points 2 months ago

    Alien, rockets not too good yet.

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  • [–] 3 points 2 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 2 points 2 months ago

    Sinister: I won't move house

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  • [–] 4 points 2 months ago

    American psycho is not a horror movie. It's way too good to be a horror movie. It's a thriller.

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  • [–] 3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

    Aliens Vs Predator: I would fully support any immigrant who attacks sexual predators.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 months ago

    This is a Masterclass.

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