No whipping, bad optics

Tazer hands however

Those at the top always make sure those before them have someone to punch down so their eyes never land on the true problem.

Por que no los dos

Loosely translated from small amount of government regulation to corporate donors

Man... I think it would be hilarious if a democratic president created a "doge" like organization, except instead of blanket cutting the government, they just explicitly cut exactly what each politician chose to cut for normal people. IE everyone who voted for this, has the AC turned off in their office and is banned from the water cooler.

Again, elect me your president and I'll create a new uniformed service subject to the UCMJ called the Corps of Engineers, in which service will be mandatory for all citizens, a prerequisite to voting, owning a business, serving as an officer, board member or shareholder of a corporation or running for political office. Imagine the US Army Corps of Engineers scaled larger than the Army and Navy combined, their mission: To build, repair and maintain public works infrastructure within United States territory. You're going to march, you're going to salute officers, you're going to wear a uniform with rank insignia, and you're going to build the infrastructure that carries the United States into to the 22nd century. We'll give you exemptions if you serve in the military, or if you serve longer in, say, the Post Office or certain other common good public services. I figure 6 years of delivering mail should count the same as 4 years of paving highways. Service in the armed forces also counts, though I'd rather focus constructive efforts within than destructive efforts without.

I thought the lettuce problem was literal slave labor (forcing prisoners to work for pennies a day).

I really like the cut of your jib, but you may have missed - https://www.hipaajournal.com/house-committee-advances-bill-preventing-osha-heat-standard/

"The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread." ~ Anatole France