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[–] 37 points 3 months ago

I am 100% guilty of this, at least once, but I will also say that if they're looking at you like this, they're probably at least taking you seriously.

It's a lot to fucking process.

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  • [–] 18 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 child)

    If this were the exact wording it would be hard to find someone not looking like that. You are using hard words for my trans dense self. It took me like half a minute to load. But yes it's a funny meme but I am required by my head to respond seriously to memes for some reason.

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  • [–] 15 points 3 months ago

    I'm really proud of myself because I was this person a while back and people talked to me about a bunch of this stuff and I actually did manage to change my beliefs for the better. Looking forward to changing some other shitty beliefs I don't know I have when others point them out!

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  • [–] 10 points 3 months ago* (3 children)

    I've been gently explaining the situation of "being trans in the UK" to cis allies recently. The reaction I keep getting is "huh I didn't realise it was that bad".

    Honestly infuriating sometimes.

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  • [–] [S, A] 6 points 3 months ago (2 children)

    At least they realise and aren’t saying “oh it’s not that bad, let’s just wait to see if anything gets worse before we worry”

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  • [–] 8 points 3 months ago

    It's a difficult thing to do.

    We, humans, are kinda built to run on a series of memories and experiences that build up, telling us what's safe and what isn't. In an ideal world, this means that new things can be compared against those templates and guide is to safe movement through life.

    But when it comes to situations where those templates get challenged from the outside, we're scrabbling on the inside against all these alarms saying "but what about...". It's a process by which we are forced to doubt ourselves. That's not what you'd call a recommended thing. The more we doubt ourselves, the more confusion, distress, dissonance, and anxiety we feel.

    Trying to initiate that from the inside? That's shit that can take decades of therapy when you're dysfunctional. It isn't much easier when you're not, but most people have at least a little dysfunction.

    It's a skill to self examine and self critique. Like any skill, you have to practice to get good. But, unlike most other skills, your brain is fighting you the entire time.

    But it's necessary. Not just on this topic. It's a skill we all need to at least dabble in, lest we fall into the trap of never changing at all

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  • [–] 4 points 3 months ago

    Right intentions but wrong method, if you wanna people to question their conditions you need to use a better wording to let other people get the message.

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  • [–] 1 point 3 months ago

    Yes. You can call me an ally if you want, or not, I don't care. I don't have a need to be called an ally. I'm here, and I'm reading and quietly learning. I'll support you, and go to bat for you when people speak badly of you. But I've got a bunch of other problems to deal with. Don't ask anything of me beyond that.

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