Just saw this while scrolling on fedi being posted by this user: @Rasta@zeroes.ca

Black text on a pink background reading: 'There is no "gender war." Women didn't take away men's right to vote. Women didn't ban men from education or property. Women didn't write laws controlling men's bodies. Women didn't build systems that stripped men of their freedom. The imbalance never ran both ways. @sheinspiresstrength'

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[–] 69 points 4 months ago (8 children)

yea but some women say "men are trash" on social media and that’s just as bad 😢 /s

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  • [–] 32 points 4 months ago (4 children)

    Well you know the saying, women's concerns are rape, murder, abuse, men worry about getting laughed at.

    /s ffs

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  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    I had a man—an "ally", no less; the kind of man who wore a "pussy hat" to a protest on behalf of women!—tell me in all seriousness that, and I quote directly, "respect is like oxygen for men".

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  • [–] 10 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

    The aggravating thing is that on blank face they're correct - but they never see the unspoken corollary of "And no one else ever has this need"

    Like fuck me you're not special mate you're just human

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago* (1 child)

    Yeah, the implication that women don't need respect like men do was really fucking gross.

    If he'd even said something like "men need respect like oxygen, and the way men express and expect respect is different from the way women expect and express respect causes friction" it might have been defensible. But he didn't.

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  • [–] 24 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    I got called a misandrist for saying "not all men, but too damn many". This has made me doubt claims of misandry. While I'm sure it exists, I'm no longer sure of it's previlince.

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  • [–] 45 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    But now men have policed each other’s gender expression so tightly that they are incapable of emotionally connecting, leading to them feeling really lonely. What are women doing to fix this unacceptable situation!?

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  • [–] 44 points 4 months ago

    Damn right. And adult women rarely murder adult men... the murder rate is wildly disproportionate.

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  • [–] 39 points 4 months ago (7 children)

    One group is fighting for their freedom but members of the other group complain when they succeed.

    Belle Hicks said it right, though, feminism is for everyone. A system that fucks over one group isn't going to treat anyone else fairly, either. More men should be fighting on our side, as much for themselves as for us.

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  • [–] 29 points 4 months ago (6 children)

    Strongly agree, feminism is for the benefit of all genders. The freedom for men to express themselves without being compared to women as an insult as an example.

    We are stronger when we have empathy and kindness upheld as ideals instead of seen as feminine and thus weak.

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  • [–] 10 points 4 months ago (5 children)

    You know, if it weren't for specifically you, velma, I would have instance-blocked sh.itjust.works ages ago. So many shit takes from that single instance.

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago (4 children)

    I have to admit that I stay on this instance for mostly superficial reasons - the name is witty and I like the UI lol

    I should use my blahaj account more often again ;)

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  • [–] 6 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Be happy you're holding sh.itjust.works up all by your lonesome. That's how awesome you are! 🤣

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  • [–] 36 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Ooh I'm sure this thread will only contain comments by people allowed to post here and that everyone will be respectful about the facts of history

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  • [–] 26 points 4 months ago* (1 child)

    No no no don't you get it? Even though women experienced all of that, some of them can still refuse sex and it's made a lot of men really like, lonely :(

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  • [–] 21 points 4 months ago

    I explained it to my sons when they were teens as such: just because in the past men were privililged to have more of the well paying employment than women and some males (rich, white, educated) had the best of those jobs, doesn't mean that today's men are unfairly disadvantaged when other men (of colour) and women (all) are also able to compete for those jobs. Blaming women and immigrants because you now have to compete with everyone else for employment isn't their fault, it is the fault of business and governments who have allowed the wealth imbalance that makes working for a living wage unobtainable for a growing portion of the population. The solution isn't being anti any group of working people. The solution is taking back control from the corporations and the 1%.

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  • [–] 16 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (40 children)

    Lowkey, I don't view it as men vs. women at all. It's really just the bourgeoisie pitting us against each other by playing favourites.

    tl;dr: Workers of the world, unite!

    Edit: I made an additional statement, which was sexist against men. I have removed it. My appologies.

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  • [–] 21 points 4 months ago (9 children)

    Conditioning is really powerful. I hear your anger, but please don't make statements like "most men are disgusting monsters" again here

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago (4 children)

    My appologies. I shan't do it again.

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  • [–] 10 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    It's fine we all post without thinking sometimes 😊

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Yeah... I'm pretty guilty of that. Posting/commenting on the Threadiverse is more fun than sleeping :3

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Should I edit/censor my comment?

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  • [–] 20 points 4 months ago (17 children)

    I'm all for a safe space for women but this reeks of sexism. Except the good ones, is a common trope among bigots who want to generalize without sounding like bigots.

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  • [–] 8 points 4 months ago* (16 children)

    I think perhaps my opinions have shifted to fit in with my sisters and mother. They say things like that they hate all men, and say "it's not personal" to my dad and brother-in-law.

    I appologise for being sexist. I shall attempt to course-correct.

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago (9 children)

    Thanks for listening and owning up. I know it's hard to break a habit when casual sexism becomes your norm.

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago (8 children)

    I honestly have a tendency to avoid taking responsibility and acknowledging when I'm wrong, but I'm trying to do better. Feel free to correct/confront me in the future.

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  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago (7 children)

    I appreciate it. As someone who fought some hard rejection sensitivity issues, it feels way better to own up than to double down when I know I'm wrong.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago (6 children)

    Oh. I looked it up, and that sounds like me. I wonder if it's connected to my social anxiety.

    Also, yeah, owning up does feel better than digging my heels in.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago (5 children)

    I learned it's part of ADHD, which I have. Naming it has helped me acknowledge when it's happening. Since anxiety goes hand in hand with conditions like ADHD, it might be related.

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago (4 children)

    I feel like I'm an egg, but for ADHD.

    So many signs, but I won't say I have it unless I'm diagnosed.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    Depending on where you live a diagnosis can be very hard to get but worth it to start working toward sooner than later (fucking impossible with ADHD, I know.) You learn a lot along the way even if you don't end up having it.

    The book Scattered Minds by Gabor Maté started my journey.

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  • [–] 3 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    I don't particularly want to be diagnosed with anything. I'm definitely autistic, though, but I'm not diagnosed.

    Permission to DM?

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  • [+] 1 point 4 months ago* (6 children)
  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    !feminism@lemmy.world is rather active and we can make it more so if you truly want to discuss these types of subjects with all genders. Maybe someone else has a better community suggestion.

    None of the community members here told you those things or said you were mansplaining. Please do not paint us all with the same brush.

    Please respect that women and femme and non-binary people want a space to discuss with each other in a safe and supportive community.

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  • [+] 1 point 4 months ago (2 children)
  • [–] 6 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    Please, I’m begging you, read the comment sections of several posts here. You’ll be able to see how polite and respectful we are to men who accidentally post. We don’t extend warm reminders to men who leave sexist or dismissive or otherwise rude comments.

    I’d rather you look for yourself than make assumptions and comment based on those assumptions.

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  • [+] 1 point 4 months ago (1 child)
  • [–] 7 points 4 months ago*

    I mean, you are repeatedly breaking the rules. That is disrespectful. You could have sent me a DM instead of commenting further.

    As you can see if you look around at the other comments, men who politely leave (or do not have a previous reputation of being jerks to us) are not shouted at but rather acknowledged as allies for respecting the rules.

    At this point I’m not so sure you’re willing to change your mind about us. It would be best for you to go now.

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  • [–] 9 points 4 months ago

    So you know the rules. You know your posting here is against the rules. And you decided to post here anyway to whine about the rules and about how your posting here is against them, daring us, in effect, to delete your post.

    And somehow this makes you a good person.

    You then proceed to make your masculine self the main character in a women's group, whining about your "genital mutilation".

    And somehow this makes you a good person and those who want to have a space to themselves bad.

    Yes, you're very obviously an "ally".

    You utter fucking berk.

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  • [–] 15 points 4 months ago* (1 child)

    Honestly I'd really like to believe it's not most men that would do fucked up shit. Men are problematic because most don't speak up when they see bad shit, but I still think it's a minority that are actually doing the bad shit. I do think that not speaking up is conditioning that can be broken though.

    At least that's me trying to live in a glass-half-full world.

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  • [–] 12 points 4 months ago* (5 children)

    I’m uneasy with this commonly seen argument here. There is a class war, but it’s not like the gender war disappears on the working class side when workers unite.

    It’s only men vs women insofar as men uphold and reinforce the patriarchy like in the post.

    People more eloquent than myself can probably elaborate on what I’m saying better than my admittedly brief comment here.

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  • [–] 6 points 4 months ago

    it’s not like the gender war disappears on the working class side when workers unite

    Indeed the working class can be some of the most socially regressive people on the planet when it comes to racial and gender issues.

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  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago (3 children)

    That makes sense. I think you're correct. Touché.

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  • [–] 4 points 4 months ago (2 children)

    Hey thanks for that. As Lady Butterfly said, conditioning can be strong.

    I think the recent news about César Chavez really drives this point home.

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  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago* (3 children)

    Idk look around the world, even places practically untouched by capitalism, tribal villages, remote rural communities, isolated traditional societies… women are almost always second class citizens at best and subjugated livestock or even worse even in some places were women giving birth will not be provided care with out her owner husband present and it’s illegal to practice midwifery but men are not allowed to practice medicine on women, even animal get medical care that isn’t discriminatory based on their sex. I fear this is just human nature or at least post agriculture human behavior

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  • [–] 2 points 4 months ago* (2 children)

    I think it might be a natural thing. In the animal world, males are usually the boss, which is due to generally being larger and stronger.

    I think it could be trained out of people—meaning both men and women. I'd like to think we're cabable of resisting nature through education.

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  • [–] 5 points 4 months ago (1 child)

    In the animal world, males are usually the boss, which is due to generally being larger and stronger

    This is why I love spiders. The females are big, beautiful, and full of color, then they eat the males once they have fulfilled their reproductive duty.

    Humans should be more like spiders and eat men (not really, I’m just being silly 😊)

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  • [–] 13 points 4 months ago

    Zero sum jags think my gain is their loss.

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