years ago when I was seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist for severe ptsd the doc wanted to put me on meds that could help my memory and also anti anxiety meds. I said no. They said I better have a good reason, I wrote them an essay. But more than that I assured my docs I would under go all the cbt , do everything I could to heal without meds. And I did.

Changing your thinking is hard, behaviourial change is hard, but you must give it some effort if you want results.

I suppose my point is change can happen many ways, it's often uncomfortable, scary, and it takes effort

I used to keep my eye on the long term goals, my life would be better if I had better mental health and better habits, i still do

good luck and so many hugs 😽