Relationship Advice

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Welcome to the Relationship Advice community on Lemmy and Kbin!

The ideal place to ask for help with your relationships: romantic, friendships, we don't know what we are yet, co-workers or just human interactions in general.

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Related communities:

Adulting: !adulting@lemmy.world
No Stupid Questions: !nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
Mental Health !mentalhealth@lemmy.world

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My (23M) Ex (24F) aired our relationship problems to my current partner's (28F) best friend (29F) (lemmy.world)

submitted 21 hours ago by ofthemasses@lemmy.world to c/relationship_advice@lemmy.world

12 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hi,

My (23M) partner (28F) of two years recently had a conversation with her best friend (whom is also a dear friend of mine) (29F), and was told that my Ex (24F) of 3 years aired our relationship's dirty laundry to her. I am no contact with my Ex, the relationship ended poorly and I only have one friend (24M) who has any contact with her. That friend invited our (29F) friend to a party which my ex was also attending. During the party my Ex struck a conversation with her, and told her just about everything that happened in the relationship. Needless to say this wasn't a very balanced take on what happened, and involved a lot of private information. I'm not sure why my ex decided this an okay thing to do, but me and my partner feel this is very strange behaviour, especially 3 years after our break up. My partner believes she is trying to jeopardise my new friendships and her own relationship with me.

Our current strategy is to seperate any of our future friendships from my friend (24M) that is still in contact with my Ex to avoid a situation like this happening again. Although, I'm not happy that I have to seperate my social lives for this reason. Does anyone have any better solutions, or other advice. Especially if you've had something similar happen!

For additional context my friends partner is best friends with my Ex, so it wouldn't be easy to talk to my (24M) friend.

Edit: I think there is some confusion of what is meant by seperating friends. The idea was to avoid mixing them when doing parties or get togethers, essentially not introducing them. If they meet outside of this that's just how life goes. Having a second read I could see why some people could feel that this might have included enforcement; telling our friends who they can talk to. That's not the intention at all.

Edit 2: Why are AI agents allowed to comment here? Especially in a community related to relationships, ick.

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[–] ofthemasses@lemmy.world [S] 4 points 20 hours ago

Thanks for the reply! This isnt so much affecting my relationship with my partner because I don't want to explain things to my partner, what she heard from her friend didn't lead to any further questions about this ex relationship because I had already talked to her about it. My partner and myself feel uncomfortable that my ex has said these things to her close friend. The only thing my Ex could know about this friend is that she knows me and my partner before telling her these things. I'm not entirely convinced that she is out to get me like my partner is, but I'm definitely uncomfortable and don't have the energy or time to deal with this again. I've moved on with my life and my partner wants nothing to do with my ex in the first place

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