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Lemmy has a sexism problem (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 1 week ago by to c/feminism@lemmy.world
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I couldn't believe my eyes seeing this advice to teach young boys to hit girls so as to restore the boys' self esteem and pride.

This is the kind of toxic belief that shouldn't be allowed to proliferate here and yet is embraced with open arms by other users.

That boys can only regain their pride and self esteem by hitting girls leads directly to more violence against women and girls.

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[–] 29 points 1 week ago* (5 children)

I'm not sure that's the point of the comment though. Maybe it is, idk.

I guess we fundamentally agree and just interpret the comment differently. Hitting others is generally not ok, except in self defense.

I interpret the comment as "The boy should learn some self defense. That will help him get over the abuse and recover some self esteem.", which I find valid.

You interpret it as "The boy should start hitting girls. This domination will lift his self esteem". I agree that's a shit take, but again, I also don't interpret the comment that way, and I don't think that those who upvoted it do.

I guess only OP can clarify what they meant.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 week ago (3 children)

    he needs to overcome this to restore his pride

    I think its pretty fucking clear.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 week ago

    Yeah, it it was just "he should be able to defend himself" I think the comment would be okay, but the commenter is clearly saying he should get physical.

    Additionally, the "its not like a grown man hitting a woman" and "restore his pride" definitely makes it sound sexist.

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  • [–] 6 points 1 week ago (1 child)

    To me it's clear that the little kid is being bullied and the adults aren't helping. It is a shitty situation. Kids do need to learn conflict resolution. Kids also need to learn about violence -- not to perpetrate it, but to recognize it, respond to it, stay safe from it. Violence is an option in the world and kids need to learn to be protected from it and choose better options.

    How do you teach kids to stand up to bullies? Somewhere in there has to be what to do in the case of violence, aka self defense, or pushing back if all else fails.

    This kid does need to overcome this problem, although "restore his pride" sounds pretty gross.

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  • [–] 1 point 1 week ago

    Poor little boy didn't want to go to school anymore. I don't think we should teach boys that self esteem comes from violence against girls, but the real villain here is the school enabling the bully.

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