Ok, full disclosure here: I'm not trans but I've been trying to help my trans daughter for years, so I do have maybe a useful opinion. But feel free to ignore me.
If you're being misgendered by people who have known you for years, especially older people, please be patient with them. Even if they are fully supportive, it can be very hard for them to rewire to use the right gender in language. Just gently correct them each time, especially if they apologize when you do; they'll get it eventually but it can take years. If someone does not apologize, or appear to try, maybe get someone else to talk to them on your behalf - not aggressively, but just pointing out that they wouldn't like to be misgendered as it's a sign of disrespect. And if they still don't listen, just cut them out of you're life - you are worth more than that.
For strangers, if you are mtf and on hrt and have some visible chest, they should know that you are female even if other queues are 'confusing'. That means if they misgendering you, they are being ignorant assholes and not worthy of your concern in my opinion. Of course you want to pass 100% and it's upsetting you because it's feedback that there are queues that they are seeing/hearing that you haven't been able to change, and that's totally valid (of course in general, anything you feel is valid, feelings are just what you feel). Try not to focus on not being at your end goal, it's not a race - you know who you are which is what really matters, and you can keep working on physical things - but recognize that there are lots of things and it takes time (and money) to get to where you want to be. It's a long journey - try to find the small incremental improvements rewarding!