Basically, several months ago, I had an online friend group when I was too shy to make IRL friends beyond my friend group. It was a Discord server for mental health support (or well, teens struggling with their mental health). They would make jokes and act friendly, so I felt comfortable around them.

Well, “Zach” started making snarky comments and making me the butt of the joke, which made everyone else join in. He would make fun of me for talking about my interests sometimes or sending memes related to my interests even when his girlfriend “Eliza” or his friend “Nikki” would do it all the time with TADC or Deltarune.

One time, Zach kept spamming the group chat, and he got really mad at me for saying “hi” because it “interrupted his spamming”.

Another time, he told me to go fuck myself and that no one liked me for mentioning a character I liked when the group chat was dead and no one was talking and I even said “I’m going to rant about this character again, sorry but don’t interact if that makes you uncomfortable.” They also damaged my self-esteem and made me overly apologetic.

I said I was leaving the server and someone said “Ok bye lol you’re so sensitive”.

My friend stepped in and told Zach to stop, and Zach said he hated me, I was a bad person, and everything was my fault so my friend couldn’t blame him.

Someone commented that my friend still was in the server, so he left. Then, Eliza kept messaging me to come back and said “It’s not that we hate you, it’s that you’re annoying, have no social skills, you suck, you act disabled, etc.”

I got mad and stopped messaging for a while, and she said “No seriously come back, we love you”

Then Zach told my friend “We don’t hate Monica (me), we just never liked her and prefer she stay away from our friend group LOL :) Thanks”

I didn’t talk about my interests often and would only do so when I had the opportunity. They would also be really snarky about it but tell me I could continue to do it. They also discussed their interests all the time, and Zach also always wanted to be the center of attention and would bully me when I didn’t praise him for being a “great person”.

Why do I wanna go back? You ask. I want to prove to them that either I can be who they want me to be or I think maybe they changed a little. It hurt really bad, but I do miss everyone who ever wronged me.