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[Vent] I feel awful... (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 2 weeks ago by to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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[–] 4 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Distractions can work well... sometimes, and exercise can work great for lifting your mood. In any case I really hope you pull through this, and it's great that you're off the kratom.

I wish I could swap whatever the hell my brain is on with yours, I get my seasonal depression in the summer, I practically feed off of the gloomy winter weather.

I really am happy to see you keep going despite all the shit you've been through <3

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  • [–] [S] 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

    Thank you 💜

    Honestly? I'm already feeling better. No idea if it's the vitamin D and mangesium I took, the fact that I'm off kratom or the SSRI...but I'm feeling good. For the first time in a long time, I don't feel like a massive piece of shit all the time. I even complimented myself in the mirror after drying my hair, which I never do. I look fine, honestly...I don't hate it.

    I feel loved. I'm doing stuff right now. I'm smiling and laughing. And (ofc) I'm taking the meds I should be taking. It's all good ♥️

    I'd still swap brains with you, wtf 😭
    Winter is so depressing, at least for me. Cold (even worse on HRT) which makes my tits hurt, the need to wear so much clothing, dark all the time, and everything is icy and slippery.
    But...I'm genuinely glad you don't see it that way. I am ❤️

    Thank you, Azalea 🩷

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago

    the need to wear so much clothing

    If I ever actually went outside for something other than work I would abuse the shit out of the cold weather and wear fem outer layers. I did get a turtleneck sweater recently and I need to get a new hoodie, preferably one that goes past my butt.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 weeks ago

    It's really nice to hear all of that from you :)

    I'd still swap brains with you, wtf 😭

    Yeah, I meant it more for you, since I really do enjoy winter and I think that'd help you out quite a bit. Although I'd be worried for you in summer as it just feels awful given it's inescapably hot, bright and dry. I bet it's preference, but also the fact I basically isolate myself the entire time, so mix that with being in a void repeating the same things over and over and it isn't easy on the mind.

    Thank you, Azalea 🩷

    You're welcome, always!

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