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Rethinking the Language of “Narcissistic Abuse”: Why the Words We Use Matter - Lived Experience Educator (www.livedexperienceeducator.com)
submitted 1 month ago by to c/autism@lemmy.world
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Just wanted to pop this article in here to help reduce incidents of friendly fire within the neurodiverse community. People with ASD and NPD face a common struggle against neuronormativity. We even face similar stereotypes about how we act! So the self-help scammers trying to turn autistic people against narcissistic people are actively harming the entire community.

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[–] 7 points 1 month ago* (2 children)

Do you have a source explaining why NPD is neurodivergent? My understanding is that autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder with a significant genetic component that, depending on severity, can seriously disable independent life. On the other hand, npd is never a disability, it is supposed to have something to do with early childhood experiences. It is a (somewhat outdated) psychological description of the way how the personality of otherwise biologically healthy people can be like and has little to no genetic predisposition.

My opinion: caring for a dependent who is autistic can be really hard, but it’s something someone does for a loved one. Being around a narcissist sucks and the only options are to set hard boundaries or get them out of your life.

Of course that distinction only matters if you use the terms to describe the disorders they mean, not if you just call people who are awkward with others autistic and people who act self centered narcissistic.

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  • [–] [S] 1 point 1 month ago (1 child)

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder#CITEREFCaligorLevyYeomans2015

    It is often co-morbid with other mental disorders and associated with significant functional impairment and psychosocial disability.[1]

    It's a disability. People with NPD (that's person first language) struggle with identity, self-esteem regulation, skill development, and interpersonal problems. Both due to society's treatment of us, and the structure of our self-identity in the brain. I recommend reading the DSM-5's appendix on personality disorders. The new model of NPD is as a system of struggles with identity formation and interpersonal interaction.

    https://www.psi.uba.ar/academica/carrerasdegrado/psicologia/sitios_catedras/practicas_profesionales/820_clinica_tr_personalidad_psicosis/material/dsm.pdf

    For an egotypical, the process by which you made your identity as a child felt effortless, because of the support of your parents. And it's easy for you to imagine that it's that easy for everyone.

    But I don't feel like a real person. My understanding of Myself is artificial. I made Myself up. And it's a fragile ego, so I frequently have to rebuild parts of it. I can change it without much effort. My way of interacting with the world is different than yours, because we both use our selves to do that, and how our selves function is different.

    So basically NPD is neurodivergence because the brain works different. And we know the brain works different, because the mind works different.

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