Thank you! I am absolutely in support of men crying and would hope I’d be able to cry occasionally no matter what. I also absolutely think my crying is due to socialization and not hormones (at least not exclusively, though I definitely notice a cycle).
I just don’t know how to express any strong emotion without tears. I feel like that’s something I should work on in therapy instead of just hoping it would change, because that seems like a recipe for personal meltdown.
I would say I shed tears on average once a day, sometimes because things don’t go the way I expected, sometimes because someone’s rude to me, and sometimes because I write a comment about being an egg. I would say the latter is a “legitimate” reason (I know that’s not the right way to look at it, but I hope it’s still understandable), and the others are me sublimating other emotions into tears, because “anger is for men” and “I should try to get along with people,” which both feel like things I don’t believe, but have internalized.
More about my experience of euphoria/dysphoria, maybe including some serious TMI
I don’t think I have dysphoria, but when I wear a binder, I just look like a flat-chested woman, and when I combine it with baggy clothing, I just look like a flat-chested and bulky woman, which doesn’t feel good at all. Wearing a strap-on feels really good and really bad at the same time (and also caused me to cry the first time), because it feels like what should be, but it also feels like I’m play acting.
I suspect that might just be deeply closeted dysphoria, but I also sometimes feel great dressing femme, so I don’t know.
TMI: I am also very into the idea of being a sissy, so I’m not sure if I feel great dressed femme because of that or if fetishizing femininity exerted onto me just a coping mechanism. Either way, it makes me feel really fucking weird whenever TERFs accuse trans women of autogynephilia.