The choice you've made was yours to make, and is perfectly valid. But don't assume everyone gets to make the same choices you do.

Pointing out that it's a choice isn't invalidating the choice. It's invalidating the demand for approval, help, and extra work that people make bcs they act like the choice was a requirement.

Your coworker made a noble sacrifice, but that doesn't entitle them to you picking up the slack for their sacrifice.

And your wife's best friend is an idiot who let hormone driven sentiment trick her into ruining her life, and I hope she has the decency to live with that by herself instead of dragging everyone else into her stupid "village".