There's some really good general wisdom in Come As You Are about responsive desire, which applies to most of us, but also just one paragraph dedicated to transfemmes saying, "I don't know what your answers are, maybe there'll be another book for you someday." And the rest of the book centers cis anatomy. So definitely go in knowing that, but it can still be helpful.

There's also a PDF zine that's called "Fucking Trans Women" that offers more specific info about us. Those two are a pretty informative combination, but hopefully something more comprehensive exists in the future.

And you're definitely not broken. So many of us deal with the exact same thing. I hope you find the answer your looking for too.