90
I'm manifesting this for y'all (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 8 months ago by to c/lesbians@lemmy.blahaj.zone
15 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] 5 points 8 months ago* (2 children)

not to invalidate your experiences, but those "men" were never your friends. and I'm happy you cultivated worthwhile relationships with people who actually are friends.

Got out of a very toxic abusive relationship a couple years ago. and cultivating relationships like that has been the most rewarding and worthwhile thing I've ever done in my life. I'm surrounded by queer commies and I love them as much as anyone can love anyone in a non romantic way.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 2 child comments
    •
  • [–] 6 points 8 months ago (1 child)

    those "men" were never your friends.

    Some of them were friends and they were people who made an honest effort to improve themselves as time went forward. I just found it difficult to remain friends with them because they still hang out with people who hold some views I can no longer be around.

    For others, that may hold more truth. Strongly depending. Some started decent and let their lived experiences change them for the worse. Some faked their progressiveness to maintain a friendship with me. Some were awful from a young age and chose to not improve themselves when given multiple opportunities. One's a cop.

    I try my best to allow people to show me their complexity and be forgiving when possible when faced with that complexity.

    Fortunately my friends now are aware and accepting of my views on complexity. We allow each other the space to be our complex selves free of labels. It's the most frictionless friend group I've ever experienced and it's so refreshing.

  • permalink
  • fedilink
  • source
  • parent
  • hideshow 1 child comment
    •