![“In my work with the defendants [at the Nuremberg Trials, 1945-1949] I was searching for the nature of evil, and I now think I have come close to defining it: a lack of empathy. It’s the one characteristic that connects all the defendants, a genuine incapacity to feel with their fellow men. Evil, I think, is the absence of empathy.” —psychologist Gustave Gilbert](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/32201175-847a-4cab-8cf0-e05945842616.jpeg)
I recommend the Netflix show "The End of the F...ing World" which is largely about this.
What I think it comes down to is that you can develop an understanding of things that are not intuitive to you, or only intuitive sometimes in narrow circumstances, and the value of human solidarity and cooperation is true on a deep enough level that there are lots of different ways to discover it. As someone who doesn't always have the emotional reactions that people expect or would be reassured by, it bugs me when people push the idea that having the wrong feelings is what makes someone a monster, both because there's way more to it than that and because projected expectations have a powerful influence. People who are angry and numb and looking for a sense of identity shouldn't be villified for the things about themselves they don't get to choose.