The trouble with self acceptance that you're having is the result of a lifetime of transphobia. Transphobia that has you believing that being trans is a bad thing. And that lens shapes thoughts like these.
For every negative example you provide there, there is a positive version. When you consider transition as a form of self love and self care, all of the things you are talking about become acts of self care. When you frame it as purely about aesthetics, you perceive it as shallow and harmful, and in turn, the act of transition becomes one of selfishness.
The thing is though, self acceptance and transition is an act of self care and self love, that improves not only your life, but the lives of the people that love you and interact with you. The trick here is giving yourself permission to be open to that possibility.
You can't reason yourself out of internalised transphobia. You won't find a mental "gotcha" that lets you undo a lifetime of negative thoughts in a moment. What you can do though is recognise that you're carrying a lifetime of negative propoganda, and recognise these thoughts as being part of that. It doesn't make them go away, but it does take away some of their power, and gives you the space to find a healthier perspective.