How many $100k jobs am I going to find in Milwuakee and Detroit?
These are literally major cities with populations measured in the millions. There's plenty of high paying jobs to be had. And the best part is, since home prices aren't measured in the millions you can survive on a lower income.
Also I work in tech too. I've interviewed for jobs making $80-120k in some of the listed cities. I know people making over 100k in some of the listed cities. Median income is just that, the median. Some people are going to make more and some people are going to make less. Highly skilled workers in any major city will make high pay. Sure you might shave off 10-20% from your expected wage in your sector in a lower cost of living city but your housing costs will likely be literally be half or a third of that when compared to LA, New York City or the San Francisco Bay Area, plus with that lower cost of living comes more options if you become burnt out from your highly paid and likely high stress job, you can afford to jump ship and change careers