After 5 months, I guess I've fully cracked. Now I'm wondering about updating my professional website, that cesspool LinkedIn, etc.

I'm a Dev (yes, I use Arch) and I used to teach. I guess I'm nervous about having to tell my old students and coworkers.

I’d love to hear strategies, lessons learned, or anything that made the process smoother.

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[–] 20 points 1 year ago (9 children)

I'm just not going to say anything. If they notice, they notice. If they don't, they don't.

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  • [–] [S] 6 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I thought about doing that, I feel like cool people can tell and ignorant people can't. Does it bother you that people use your deadname?

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  • I haven't even picked a name yet. I only came out to my partner a couple of months ago. I've been acting half my life already I can keep it going a couple of years more.

    Basically neither of us are planning to stay where we are so my plan is present as male until we can afford to move, then it's new house, new city, new life. Not that we live in a conservative city, we just live in one of the more conservative parts of it and my pansexual therian kid already has enough problems at school. Without also being the only kid in class with two mothers, one of which is a giant hairy (obviously) trans lesbian.

    My actual goal for transition is to feel comfortable in my own skin, and to be treated as female by the people in my life who matter to me. The last one is self fulfilling because if people in my life see that I'm transitioning and insist on calling me by my deadname, then I don't need to bother with them. Honestly most people here genuinely wouldn't say anything about it even if they have a massive problem with trans folk. Norwegians are very avoidant of conflict by nature.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago (4 children)

    I did that and was disappointed that basically no one noticed.

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

    I'm not really sure it'd bother me that much. I mean I know that estrogen won't turn me into a hot 25 year old. Truth be told, the only real difference I care about are the mental effects. I'm really angry all the time, even when there's nothing to be angry about. And I just feel like maybe I can leave that behind and be happy about who I am. I genuinely don't give a shit how other people see me. Perhaps that'll change later, idk.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    Yep, that was me too. Angry. The first thing those close to me noticed was mood changes.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    So it helps? Because all consuming rage is just a baseline negative emotional state at this point and I don't have any real happiness in my life. I'm kinda hoping that will change.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    Yes, exactly that.

    Before HRT I felt either empty or angry, and little else. I was quick to anger from any minor frustration, my baseline emotion was very negative, and my sense of humor was worryingly self deprecating. At one point I achieved a lifelong goal and felt nothing, which concerned me greatly.

    Since HRT that has all changed. I have emotional range. I feel things. I can regulate my emotions. I feel things correctly. HRT did that!

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