I've had the same Hue bulbs for over 7 years now with no issues. The brand itself is very good. As other have said, you can interact with them via Google or Home Assistant directly, and when you're ready you can directly switch them over to Zigbee or something more open if you want to ditch the online services. People here will pressure you to do that immediately, but I think dip your toes in with the official automations, see how you feel, and then see if you want to switch it over. Hue is a great way that will work from app based official all the way down to 6 years from now when you're coding your own automations.

I leave my lamps powered on all the time with hue bulbs and have never had an issue. Even very old lamps have been completely fine. For usability and wife approval I would recommend getting a switch (which is useful for other reasons too) that you can stick on your wall and turn them all off at once. Even if your wife is onboard with automation, a switch will make it mother-in-law proof.