Happened to me the first several times I took edibles. I guess that's a thing? I didn't know, so I just figured I hadn't had enough. I doubled it and still nothing. Figured if I literally felt nothing, it's probably safe to double again. Still nothing. So I doubled it for a third time. I did think 40mg was probably too much, but this was try number four and I was wondering if it would ever work at all.

Oh it did.

I've never again been that absurdly high. But I was at home safe, amused by my own stupidity, and now it's a fun memory. I guess technically I did handle it, so my i thinking wasn't too far off. But I can get plenty high off 20 now. It just took a few tries to kick in.

Every single time I have an edible, there's this moment where I think to myself, "I'm on the ride now. No getting off until it's over." It kinda helps because I'm acknowledging that feeling, but also reassuring myself that this will be fun, and even if it isn't, it will end.

The OG trilogy was definitely best, but I think the later games suffered from the high expectations. They were still above average RPGs and even felt like Suikoden games, they just weren't literally among the best of all time.

Tierkreis wasn't to the level of even 4 or 5, but it was still fun for a spinoff. There's also a fan translation available for the PSP one, which can be fun if you temper your expectations. It's the least Suikoden feeling of all of them.

Konami definitely dropped the ball, but none of them were bad enough to kill the series, imo.

Yeah, it's very maskable. And if you're a late diagnosis, you've got pretty good masking skills. That's why a true professional doesn't just give you the test: they monitor you during the test to look for other signs. I was genuinely afraid of winding up at a place that just fobbed the entire diagnosis off on a computerized test. With good reason!

I mention my case because it was so hard to get the correct diagnosis, and I still only barely did. The system is really not designed to handle adults at all, let alone the more complicated ones. So I want to encourage people to trust themselves and their own experiences. The tests do get it wrong.

You have a number of similarities with me. I don't struggle to understand or get along with people, but I've also done a lot of reading to learn about communication and relationships. I have many changing special interests, but each time I get a new one I hyperfocus on it for a while. Then the interest dies and I'm sad again until the spirit possesses me and I'm off to learn some new thing. I'm also very honest and usually can't hold myself back from pointing out problems or making corrections.

I had to do specific research to find a local doctor who specialized in diagnosing ADHD. I was sick of doctors who'd judge in less than an hour, "you don't seem like my ADHD patients so you don't have it." I told the specialist about those experiences and she made sure to do a very detailed analysis. If not for that, even she would have overlooked the ADHD (the autism is more obvious).

I'm gifted and also have CPTSD, so when you add that to being both autistic and ADHD, I just mask it too well. I passed for normal on the tests, but when the doctor looked closer, she did see enough evidence to make a strong case. The self and family questionnaires certainly suggested it, but she needed to find some more concrete evidence. By analyzing my test performance, she found a habitual pattern where I pass the tests, but right at the end of each I get careless and make a few mistakes that someone of my intelligence should really never make, let alone consistently. It was her assessment that I can mask through the test, but it takes enough effort that I'm exhausted by the end. So I let my guard down when the end is in sight and make dumb mistakes.

It's no wonder it took until 42 to get the diagnosis.

Not arguing for or against here, but that's not a very good test. I can't imagine what my life would have been like without my best friend of over 20 years, but I can still say for certain that I'm in a vastly better place than I would have been without them. Even if I just limit it to my intellectual development.

There are valid criticisms of social media, but I don't think that's one of them.

Yeah, fair enough. It's a lot more predictable than English, but if you don't know the rules, kana alone would be insufficient for proper pronunciation. (Pitch accent is a whole other story.)

These are predictable rules at least. ん assumes the following place of articulation, and high vowels go unvoiced at the end of words or between two unvoiced consonants.

I don't expect it to change, so I've kinda made peace with it. I try to focus on other things and just enjoy the freedom of solitude.

I just don't reach out. It's a lonely solution and I can't recommend it.

As a fellow autistic, I rarely even answer that question. Most people don't really care or need an answer, so I just ignore it completely and change the topic. If I must answer, I'll usually say something like, "I'm hanging in there." It's not pretending that everything is fine, but it's got a sense of positivity to it. Like: I'm handling it and you don't need to worry about me. That way it's neither pretending, nor dragging down the mood.

Brought to you by overthinking this question for decades.

That's the one thing I appreciate about Death Note: making the normal looking guy the psycho is common enough, but it goes a step further to give a little positive representation for us weird loners.