goats don't chew gum...

Don't like it, find another church. They're a dime a dozen, and they're all fucking ridiculous.

Oh no

Anyway

The gum thing is honestly one of the more reasonable things he said

He also said not to drink water, and that only Pentecostal churches let people drink water in church lol

Gum is at least understandable, if not because its somehow for goats. It could be distracting and bothersome to the folks sitting around the gum chewer, so I think asking folks not to chew it is reasonable... The rest is sillier though, it's worth looking at the article cause its kinda funny

Something something speck of dust something something plank in your own eye. I don't remember or care enough to look it up.

Dude doesn't believe what he's preaching.

Don't make yourself look like a goat. It will tempt him.