I'm sorry, "identity condiments"? The fuck?

This sounds like a bit. Seriously, how do you hit every culture war talking point but make it about mayonnaise? No one has strong feelings about mayonnaise, Sandy. Only you.

It's like traditional media figured out in 2016 Boomer ragebait is the only thing they know how to do anymore, and just keep doing that when they're out of ideas.

Article tl;dr "Kids today are traitors to the nation because they aren't Stephen Miller, drinking mayonnaise by the gallon, because it's not threatening to people with fragile egos and no sense of curiosity."

Plus, trashing ajvar and chimichuri? How bold of you, Sandy. How courageous to turn up your nose at flavors that you were not exposed to in some midwest surbabn bubble. When you die and your spirit is flung into the void between lives, where you learn how you'll be reincarnated as a racoon for 20 lifetimes because of the karma you accrued just from penning this single article, I hope the spirits of your Lithuanian parents remind you that judgement like this poisons the soul slightly more than mayonnaise does.

Guy hadn't had real aioli. Doesn't even know what aioli is.

Name literally means "garlic and oil" because those are the only two ingredients you need for it.

It's very easy to make at home; start with a few toes of garlic and a table spoon on olive oil. Crush and mush them together till it seems like the oil disappeared. Then add another tablespoon of olive oil and repeat till you have this nice, white looking condiment.

That read like a shit post. Does Jake drink mayo straight from Sandy's tit still? Cause something ain't right there

Wait until she hears about sriracha mayo.

I'm pretty sure that's all tongue-in-cheek. Giving people the benefit of the doubt is a good default setting.

Most of those are fine with me tbh

it also creates a hydrophobic layer on bread so you can have a moist sandwich and not have it drown the bread

It is, and we probably did kill that one but they never wanna give us credit for the good we do

That’s what I grew up on, unfortunately, so everything else tasted weird.

But now I use Kewpie (Japanese brand) and it’s way better.

For real

Yeah I dunno. Miracle whip is gross as fuck.

Ah. I get it, no one actually looked up the article.

https://www.phillymag.com/news/2018/08/11/mayonnaise-industry-millennials/

As Boston chef Scott Jones told Ari LeVaux, “The magic that sets mayonnaise above Coke and Heinz is that mayo is a perfect flavor carrier.” It just makes everything better. Need proof? Do other condiments have pale imitators like Miracle Whip and Just Mayo and Vegenaise? I don’t think so!

Millennials are brutal murderers

Thought it was going to be: Homemade

While I'm sitting there eating my Kewpie mayonnaise I always find it so amusing how obsessed (some) Americans are with Japanese mayonnaise. It tastes just like the mayonnaise I'm used to from... well, everywhere else in the world except the US.

Isn't that some kind of fish monster.

I mean, Mayo is cheap, aioli is expensive.

Aioli is not mayonnaise though. There's no egg, just garlic and oil. Although I bet a bunch of restaurant aiolis are technically mayo.

My partner and I are elder millennials, and I regret to inform you that we are keeping the people at Miracle Whip in business. I grew up poor and trashy, and one of my favorite snacks as a small child was Miracle Whip "sandwiches". It was just Miracle Whip on nutrient deficient white bread.

I think in some sort of rebellion against what I was fed growing up, one of my favorite hobbies since I was allowed to use the stove has been cooking. I can make some very bougie dishes, but Miracle Whip will always have a place in my tuna salad and deviled eggs. My partner puts it in his grilled cheeses before frying them. We're trash baskets at heart.

What is mayonnaise to you? I thought Hellmans was the mayonnaise?

Of course, I would not know better than most, as I hate mayonnaise and am a 57-year old woman from Vietnam.

But the real one or the "ajonesa"?

Elbow macaroni

Mayonnaise

Carrot

Chives

Cherry tomatoes

Cucumber

Bell pepper

Pepper

an abomination, from the same people who gave us jello

Mayo is 99% plant based already. Just a little egg yolk to act as a surfactant.

Yeah I've been trying the avocado oil ones and I can't notice any difference

I have a Costco pack of hard boiled eggs and a tub of mayo in my fridge just so I can make egg salad on demand.