I'm currently funded by IKEA and looking to get a raise; my LinkedIn antifa group says it'd help if I had a competitive offer.

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[–] 59 points 1 year ago* (2 children)

I'm sponsored by Big Gay to promote liking cocks. They have a good health plan which includes free prostate exams. The PTO is a bit underwhelming tho; they really expect you to push cockliking 24/7, 365. It's hard

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  • [–] 37 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    Wait, you all get paid?!

    My recruiter told me this was entirely a volunteer position.

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  • [–] 22 points 1 year ago

    The sorosbucks seem to be drying up lately. All these abortions aren’t going to pay for themselves, I might have to go paint a few crosswalks with rainbows to make up the difference

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  • [–] 16 points 1 year ago

    Ben & Jerries. I'm not a real believer though, I'm only in it for the compensation in product. Tubs and tubs of ice cream.

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  • [–] 15 points 1 year ago

    I'm currently freelance antifa, the gig work pays better

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  • [–] 13 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I work in the warehouse for Antifa Co. Hillary Clinton and Obama sign my checks!

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

    I'm being funded by penguins. I don't know why, I don't even like mackerel that much but these fuckers swam from Antarctica, up the Mississippi, up a few tributaries, to deliver more fish than I know what to do with. So I can't tell them to fuck off and that I already am on their side. That'd just be mean. So anyways, anybody want some fish?

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  • [–] 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

    Currently I get my salary indirectly from the International Practical Chemtrail Cabal (IPCC), with the social media PR side more as a side hustle.

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago*
    [–] 9 points 1 year ago

    The support of viewers like you

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago

    Big Gay Tech

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  • I'm currently crowd funded, but I've been thinking about seeing if Blue Cross Blue Shield wants to fund me

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  • [–] 9 points 1 year ago (1 child)

    I’m funded by Big Small, the lobbying group for those people who sell hand made crafts on the sidewalk.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 child)

    I'm actually funding the shadowy leftwing cabal unfortunately. Would be nice if it went the other way but alas

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago

    I am funded by Antifa LLC and The Trans Agenda Corp.

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago

    According to my government I'm the lackey of Soros, getting paid to make our kids gay and bring migrants into the country. It honestly starts to sound like a good deal, especially when I look at the paycheck I get at CPS

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  • [–] 8 points 1 year ago

    I'm funded by Soros' housemaid

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  • [–] 7 points 1 year ago

    I'm funded my Big Small that is trying to sell more less

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  • [–] 6 points 1 year ago

    Formerly funded by the biggest socialist organization in the USA. They owe me money (whenever the current pissing match ends) and i kinda need it.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago

    I missed cabal sign up day so I’m waiting for Soros to give me my orders.

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  • [–] 5 points 1 year ago*

    A lefty grubby commie mom and pop global big box store. Its all very socialist.

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  • [–] 4 points 1 year ago

    Tell them I offered a whole $5 more. If that doesn't get management to scramble for a budget extension, nothing will.

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  • I'm selling patch space on a nascar style battle jacket.

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  • [–] 3 points 1 year ago

    The GNU/Linux corp.

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    The Erotic Bakery

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    @bruhbeans somebody let me know, stat!

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    bruh! you get funding?!

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  • [–] 2 points 1 year ago

    The Shadow Wizard Money Gang

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  • [–] 1 point 1 year ago