If an apple a day keeps em away, what happens if you eat 80% of an apple, maybe the real problem is that most of us don't eat the core and stem, doctors have a very refined apple consumption detection organ that can detect even slight deviations!

I ate an apple once. Then i was hit by truck. The medics did their best...

Nope, gotta shove it back up in there. Rules are rules.

Don’t take apples! Nothing bad can happen, it can only good happen. But with apples, don’t take it! Don’t take it! And if you can’t live, if your baby is so bad you have to take one because there’s no alternative to that, sadly. First question, what can ya take instead, it’s actually there’s not an alternative to that. And as you know, other of the, other of the apples are absolutely proven bad. I mean they’ve been proven bad with the Galaxy Crisps and the Granny Smiths and others, right? And they’ve been proven bad.

When the doctor accidentally eats an apple:

Fortunately apples have no effect on midwives

Midwife time!